I have strong urges to binge and purge. I can’t think about food without feeling guilty. I feel enormous and I can’t stand it. Every time I eat, I feel like it wasn’t worth it; I could’ve saved the calories. Next time, I’ll just stop eating…except, all I want to do is eat; I’m always hungry. Eat and puke…I deserve to have my head in a toilet.
I dearly miss my lw of 92lbs. I regret accepting the medications that made me fat. Now people just see me as a whale that can’t stop eating. What will it take to be thin again?
I hate that I’m hungry and I hate that I need to eat.
Or do I?
I’m hell bent on losing weight.
I’ll binge and puke and exercise…whatever it takes.
Have you tried in patient treatment for your ED? I was about 14 when my ED began. Right after my mom died but I grew out of it. I haven’t purged in years. I haven’t been anorexic in years. Not everyone is so lucky. You may need treatment for this
I’m obese yet I just overeat and I don’t worry that much about it anymore
A therapist told me that when we feel out of control one thing we can control is what we put in our mouths
Umm holy ■■■■. Do you realize what you’re doing to your body. I’m a former anorexic, and scales are for fish. Binging and purging and exercise bulimia is killing every system and part of your body. Seek professional help as soon as possible. The complications are way too costly to your well-being. Your meds won’t work right either. Please, please get help!
I used to feel that way. (You oughta see me now. I’m a chubby girl). I was terrified of gaining weight. I went through anorexia and bulimia. It’s a terrible illness. What triggered mine was my mother’s illness and death. Add to that I was only 13 when she got sick
Please seek help. I don’t know much about eating disorders, but I do know that they can be really dangerous. You are hurting yourself. I know this isn’t easy. I’m sorry you’re going through this.
Can you talk to your pdoc about it and see what they say? And maybe try and put off losing weight until you talk to them? I am worried about you. This is a dangerous road that leads nowhere good. Do you have a therapist? Maybe talk to them too.
I got through anorexia without treatment. There are workbooks, websites and outside support groups. Pm me if needed or openly talk here if need to. This is a very very serious situation that you are in. I am not one to give unsolicited advice, but you started this thread. People here care
I used an app called Recovery Record. It’s free. I wasn’t able to stick with it for long because I’m so all over the place, but it seemed like a useful tool.
You listed a website. Have you seeked outside help? You are being negative and saying you “screw it up.” Why not try to change your negative thought to a more accurate thought. Being negative when you have a disease isn’t helpful to yourself. What evidence do you have that you’ll “screw up” tomorrow? You’re minimizing bulimia, a very very complex life threatening disease. Asking for help might be a good idea, after all what’s the worst that could happen…
I’ve tried some different things over the years. There is a walk-in clinic near my home that I plan to visit next week. I do minimize it, I realize that.
If you or someone you love is suffering from an eating disorder, you can call the eating disorder hotline to find services in your area at 1-800-931-2237
You can also text NEDA to 741741 to receive support by text message
