13 years of isolation is not nothing

I start to get old and all my life I only knew the illness. now I want to live but for this I should leave the house one day. and how when I am paranoid and where I don’t want to do anything anymore? yeah, its such a damn hard case of schizophrenia what I have… 13 years of isolation and after this all you wanna do is to die because everything is so harder now :(…

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Hang in there, @Anna10

You’ve always got friends right here on this site to talk to. You don’t have to be alone. :sunny:

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ok, thank you… but the lack of motivation is hard. and probably it becomes harder when doing nothing isn’t it? what a screwed life I had, I am too dull, too stupid to be at this point right now :frowning:

Can you join a Club? One that interests you hobby-wise?

@Anna10 could not sleep and read your post. You are not alone, here are other lonely ones too, here is one writing, at least you came here to talk to us, be positive, I know sometimes it can be difficult, but you can manage if you want.

I don’t have a hobby anymore, I am so depressed also and my personality is non existant for the moment or not… but I cant feel pleasure anymore…

I’m something in the same shape as you, but I’ve hung in there longer + so stronger in a way. Also my attitude is better than yours.

Getting? old. I’m seriously thinking about trying sarcosine, despite the unknowns that come with it. I don’t have a lot to lose in my life right now, so maybe the risks outweigh the known status quo. I’d like to be able to do things.

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Lok online for groups and evening classes etc
Sometimes being we have to be brave and let others in.
Fortune favours the brave.
I’m determined to meet new people and get out there it’s hard I know it is but we deserve a nice life and friends.

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I don’t have the desire anymore, sorry… I am just screwed up :cry:

Your not screwed up at all it’s ok whatever you do .
There’s nothing wrong with you our minds just go on a lop and go I am bad because…

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Hang in there @Anna10 and take it little by little. :pensive: I’m always here if you need someone to talk too

ask ur psychiatrist for antidepressant if ur not on it already… it will not cause weight gain only antipsychotics does that… but u still need to eat to improve ur mood.

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ok raen, in fact I eat and I don’t gain weight anymore but its still just a month that I got back on zyprexa. I still hope that it will work more than this cause my paranoia and my fear of the death because of this illness are strong… I don’t know how to explain it, I am stressed by the darkness of my mind and of the darkness of the others minds :D…
I would like so much to be on the fewer possibles meds. I already have one ap, one regulator of the mood(Depakote) and very often a rivotril. I think one antidepressant in plus it will make a lot of meds, isn’t it? :/…

cj, do you think that one month is not enough for an ap? cause I am stuck in my bed. sometimes its because the lack of motivation, sometimes because I am really paranoid… for the lack of motivation theres no hope from the aps, isn’t it? my paranoia and the feeling that I am not attractive and crazy are really strong per moments so I don’t go out then…

I apologize for my ignorance but I do not know what ap (ap’s) mean. Can you elaborate?

“Ap’s” stands for “anti-psychotics”.

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I would consult with your doctor, look up more information on your ap, dosage amounts, etc. i don’t know if you’ve taken it for a consistent amount of time. If the cost of taking the medicine is not worth the benefit, or vise versa its your descision to talk to your doctor about continuing or discontinuing it. Personally I think one antipsychotic would be enough but we all respond different to different medications. You just need to find your right concoction, which might take some time. I suggest you speak to your pdoc about trying a new antipsychotic if it’s negatively effecting you. (With his knowledge of the medicine your on/dosage/time to take affect.) @Anna10

ok, thank you cj but I tried them all really now… I should make some efforts I guess… they just don’t work for me like for other schizophrenics… but without them I cant even get out of the bed. so that’s already good that I am on my feet with my zyprexa, even though that I don’t leave a lot the house still :/…
I listened to the docs for 7 years without a lot of progress but my attitude towards the people became mean so I should work on this right now I guess. to open myself more to others :slight_smile: