World of SZ, could you tell a lie?

DX'd - Sz/SzA
1

Is being honest the best thing to do ?
I am not talking about telling a major lie.

A lie to test how genuine you a known person, is.

While I was young I felt lie is something I will never try or think of.
But as I grow up majority wore mask, to break it, only solution is a lie.

The sick part is I have sz and cannot prove anything,
if I try to, there would be a rejection.

Have you tried a lie, to check on people?

I am not justifying, you have to lie.
But have you ever tried to do willingly, to know the other well ?

I just feel being honest, all play tricks and games, as they lie and I fall in it.
I think I need to change my friends circle and start choosing my new friends.

I am so jealous of how people mind work, I wish I could also be part of the world.

Its just that some realisation is worth so much, when I don’t have the capability to compete in the world and multiply.

I am a forbidden seed that should not be sowed. That’s how it flows ?

I am so angry on my self, as I am not (getting / being) mature.

My mind is not growing as compared to my known people.

I feel the best way to communicate is with silence.
The other will make up his or her own story as per their thought flow,
and I could chase my own interest and passion.

Its so good typing it all down.
I found the answer,
I will be silent to all the noise in the world.

Do share your thoughts as well. Thanks.

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Yeah i get jealous of other people too kind of, but most people are utterly miserable and i’m generally more happy than them so i guess that counts for something.

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Yes I will be happy than the rest, but the socialising asks for more.
People compare with some things visible.
Since this condition is not visible,
I don’t know were I fall,
Like an internal debate with self, for and against the topic.

I having a racing thoughts now, missing out on many things.
Because of racing thoughts, I forget what I thought of, past few seconds.
I think focusing on my interest, is the only success I see with this mindset.
Like placing my thought into code and the system will decide, have I did the right one or not.

4

I cannot lie, I cut down the cherry tree.

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Interesting, I googled it, then, I got to know. Thanks.

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I use to lie when I felt it wasn’t other people’s business or I just didn’t want them to know. However when my voices started they threw up every lie and everything I had ever done wrong in my face.

Now I don’t because if they come back they’ll have nothing on me and my concience is clear.

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That’s good @Turtle44
Its one of my fears to telling a lie,
As soon as I do it triggers many things.

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