This can be tough, but you know what happened in the past wasn’t necessarily up to me. I don’t have a bead on everything but I’m on a search to find what has been real in my life and what is a mind warping illness. As for my interviews and interrogations in my head I don’t really provide too much. Truthfully, I think this is the most I’ve ever opened up about my illness ever.
I get interrogated everyday for something I don’t know about. I don’t understand how it happened. I’ve been diagnosed and now the question of what in my life was real, what is real, is constantly swirling inside me. Some of my hallucinatory bodies that lead me to believe I’m in big trouble are:
John Brennan
Eric Shinseki
Charles Beckwith
former colleagues of my branches of service
Jack Shanahan
many others pursue me such as senator Dave Syverson, and the thought of the (psychic warrior) is enticing these voices into keeping me in this controlled environment until they can find out what to do with me. Often I’ve been told I’m going back to the military because I could possibly still be an asset to the armed forces. However, when I voice this fear to my friends and loved ones they ground me. Then the voices proceed to say never again…that I’ll never ever be in that situation again. Kind of like I’m a cat and they have the string…very frustrating. Instead of going and meeting these people face to face I deal with them in my head watching everything and thought monitoring. I consult them on martial arts, weaponry, and spiritual trainings that reinforce action and logic. They also want to learn about the occult…and I’m not touching that ■■■■.