It’s the same realm for sure. Yeah. Recognise your uniqueness but it’s nothing special.
After years of using this website I’ve seen how " Normal " I am…Yeah think I’m Jesus. Someone has been there. Feel I’m this or that…yeah someone has been there so it’s all part of it.
I’m not dissing you. I’m just saying it’s all part of it. Just we aren’t mystics or anything near that. Just look here and you see that!
It’s so obvious and we are doing better than most even using this forum!
I am the last person in the world who should have ever got schizophrenia. I didn’t have much going for me before I got sick, I had few friends and I’ve been shy and withdrawn my whole life. I had low self esteem and no confidence. I was already destroyed as a person, even before schizophrenia hit. I only talked to a few people in high school, I barely said a word to anyone else. I was painfully awkward with women, I didn’t feel like people liked me and I didn’t blame them. People asked my friends why I never talked.
Now, all that is true but for someone who was shy and not good looking, I still had a good time. I did some cool stuff with my friends and at school I used to sell pot on lunch breaks out in the field where all the stoners hung out so I got a little known for that. I partied with some of the cool popular kids at school.
When I got out of high school I immediately got a job and that started a string of 15 or 16 jobs over the following two years but I didn’t last more than three months at any of them. I was smoking a lot of pot with friends I made at a couple of my jobs. We had our first cars and we got around and had our little adventures. I had a lot of fun.
I was probably in my prodromal stage of schizophrenia when I was 17 and the year before I got diagnosed I didn’t have much of a life. I stopped seeing some friends and others friends stopped seeing me. My days consisted of jogging in the hills or laying on the couch watching TV.
Before Sz. i was really fit and walk fast…But now my body makeup has changed from the medicine… i gain weight super quick now, and walk like a snail compared to other people. haha.
Right up until I turned 15 I was outgoing and rambunctious. When I was 15 I shut down. I did drugs. I didn’t study. There was nothing positive about my life. I’m glad those days are over.
I was hard working, had 2 jobs. I had a big house and was proud of my success. I raised 4 kids until the divorce of course, she got full custody. I lost it all, even my truck thanks to schizophrenia.
I was a weird kid. I remember the voice since I was six. I don’t really remember much before that. I was happy as a child and early teen and miserable when I was 15-20. I was selfish and disturbing. I didn’t get diagnosed until around 36. By that point, untreated, I felt like I was dying slowly.
Before sz I had other MH struggles off and on. High school sucked.
But there was a good period of time when I was 19-24 (it wasn’t all good but overall good). I was thin, had a job, was in university, had a quite a few friends and knew lots of people, lots of people liked me, and I had my own cool apartment in the heart of the city.
It ended abruptly though. I started hearing voices to kill myself so I listened because I was new to this and wasn’t on meds yet. But obviously I survived. And then my real struggles began.
I enjoy reading about your life. Idk the way you write your memories is interesting to me. It seems you’ve had a bit of a rough life though. Bless your heart.
B4 sz I was very compassionate. I was a humanitarian. I used to sign petitions to get political prisoners out of prison.
Ie a Iranian born American citizen (Saeed Abedini) was put in prison in iran based solely on the fact he helped establish house churches in Iran. Enough people signed a petition to get him out.
I was great at fourteen. When I turned 15 I started using drugs every day and went downhill. By sixteen I had fallen behind my peers and was lowly and ignorant. I had no where to go but up. I learned to read and got my high school diploma ( G. E. D. ),then I went to college for a little while.
I was enrolled in a university to get a degree in classical guitar but had a big relapse in mental health and failed out. No one’s ever encouraged me to go back.
I’m 53 now and practice guitar a half hour each day and my guitar teacher in school told me to practice 2 hours a day. I’m burned out and busted. I couldn’t manage college. I enjoy what I do today and get high praise from my mental health clinic for being stable.
I was busy. Always outside getting into things with friends. Did good in school. My final years up into the beginning of my prodromal phase at 16 I had been skating for several years and had a big group of close friends. We all skated, Street raced, started going to parties, and got involved in a ton of jackass type schemes and behaviors. I liked to have fun and never questioned whether I was down for something. I had a great childhood, but wouldn’t want to do it again.