I’m curious how convincing others’ experiences are. Any specific examples? It could be a weird coincidence, a thing your voices said, some apparent glitch in reality - just interested in hearing why others believed their delusions or don’t believe they’re actually schizophrenic.
Um, maybe it was that portal in my living room? Along with those two characters dressed in black that I startled so they ran past me, bumping into me, knocking me to the ground.
I jumped up and saw them run right into my room, slam and lock the door, so I ran into the adjacent room, looked out the window and saw them run out the window and jump over our fence and disappear.
Fun fun.
Then there were these ? Creatures? That I could see, along with that ‘Sony’ CCTV cam with the lights around the square lens infrared?low light camera?
That could only be seen if I angled two front lens mirrors (my terminology is lacking due to not using it) together, and I could also see into someone else’s house (while in my own room).
It would also show like those old 8mm protector movies, super 8’s I suppose, and the movies would be anything I’ve seen on earth before.
How about that long, pointy chinned alien with the sideways mouth on it, stuck on the side of my shower curtain, striking up a casual conversation with me while I in there doing my business.I said to me, 'why, You’ve been a wafer too long".
Oh the bags full of tricks at my house.
Had enough?
“What was the most convincing thing you experienced that made you believe a delusion”
I don’t know about most convincing but there were some things that I really misinterpreted like the bible.
also
I’m starting to realize that I was not perceiving the universal reality, and that my activities (even my own writings) could distort my perceptions of it.
1 Like
I believed that people were trying to get me to commit suicide. In many conversations I kept thinking people were making veiled suggestions that I commit suicide. When a caseworker was saying how she couldn’t live with it if I committed suicide, I heard facetiousness and sarcasm in her voice. One time I was sitting in this lounge at a mental health center and this aid was talking to me. She said, “If you don’t change, you’re just going to keep ending up in places like this, and that’s just a great big waste. It would just be a waste.” Then someone at the desk called my name, and she said, “You’re being paged, Tom.” There were a lot of other times too. It scared me. I took off to Texas. I came back, but I bought a .22 auto handgun. I wasn’t going to walk into a crowd and open up, or anything like that, but if someone had walked up behind me on a dark night I just might have turned around and shot him. My reasoning was that when they saw I wasn’t going to commit suicide they would send someone after me.
1 Like
When I had my first psychotic break, 2 years ago, there were a few things that got me.
Picking up a lady in the park to give a ride home who knew all my business and told me so
My body practicing martial arts while my brain watched (I don’t know martial arts)
Speaking (EXACTLY) in Ken Jeong’s voice in the hospital (This is the BIGGEST thing)
Speaking in a foreign language
Singing (much better than I do in real life)
7-11 giving me a free Coke
Starbucks giving me a free Frappacino
A deer running in front of our car in the middle of downtown Tacoma, WA (there are NO deer anywhere near here! Are you kidding me?)
Losing control over my own mind and body several times
Susan Sarandan sitting in front of me at an event and continuously turning around to look at me as if I were a celebrity
Having a drink with one of my ‘go ahead and use my body’ hook-ups (the last one before I became MI and celibate, actually) sitting at a roof-top bar in Seattle while EVERYONE stared at me. It was fu*cking weird as shyt. No exaggeration.
A car driving in front of me and the lady I picked up in the park with an old school camera hanging out the back, poking through some velvet curtains pointed right at us. (This wasn’t the actual camera… The actual cameras are the size of a pinhead and are everywhere. This was just them letting me know I am being watched all the time)
There are many, many things. Nothing has happened in a very long time. Most of it happened right during my first break, within a week or so. It may have been awhile but it is very hard to forget.
My biggest thing that drew me into my illness was that my pdoc would talk about my delusions like they where real things happening to me. I guess he was trying to see how delusional I was but it really made me believe it. Then sometimes I would share what I thought was going on with people. Instead of people saying I think your mistaken or just plain loosing it. They would act like they agree with me and it would just feed the delusions. Some times you just need people to be honest with you.
2 Likes
Mine seemed to be fairly consistent with my religious beliefs. I never questioned why I was being singled out by demons, as if I was such an amazing Christian that of course I would be targeted by demons…
I did think that I was special/chosen in some way. I thought that I was anointed to speak the truth and people would believe… I begged God at one point to relieve me of the obligation to witness because the attacks by demons were too much for me. I did stop witnessing (telling people the gospel) because I believed the demons would leave me alone.
It honestly wasn’t until my son shared what his sz experiences were/are that I had to consider that I was delusional. His experiences were sci-fi/political and so obviously not real… so, I had to consider and then admit that I wasn’t just an anointed/amazing Christian.
2 Likes
I had a dog. I did not IRL. I was so frustrated when the rest of the family ignored the poor thing.
I did not even know what schizophrenia was before I was in hospital.
The creepiest shyt is when I hear people talk about things very personal to me, and then, the things actually happen.
Like hearing a guy at the entrance of a store say something about “his friend from high school” and then running into a good friend from high school in the back of the store.
Like two women at a gas station talking about “theyre gonna get him driving” and then passing three cop cars near my home.
Like having a dream that this girl I was dating told me she would never see me again and then her rejecting me soon after via text.
It goes on an on. Who cares, everyone here experiences it. We are the kings of nightmares. Jack Skellington tatto on point. Pumpkin King in this bitch. Phoenix up in this junt- hold my lemongrass, rising from ashes, be right back.
1 Like
For me its the feelings
The feelings from the voices and telepathy
1 Like
Yes, I agree. The thoughts and feelings are so convincing. Very.
I pray for weak teams in sports like football, basketball, soccer etc and the weak team that i pray for beats the strong team, so that makes me wonder if i am delusional.
1 Like
I had a wiretap app and it would pop up so I started communicating with the popups like one popup for no two popups for yes.asked if the person wanted to hurt me and it’d spam And me and my best friend were at the park in the bushes and it was going off so I kept asking questions. I can’t remember what we were asking but she kept taking it as a joke and I eventually turned it off. a man slowly walked past us, very slow and i ignored him. He came back and was going into the bushes still slowly and she pointed him out.
She had a wiretap on her phone as well that wouldn’t go off. But when I turned off mine hers turned on when we were in the library.
She took out her battery and we went to call from a payphone. I needed my boyfriends number so she was finding it and all the contacts disapearred.
Then when I said I was going to have to go to my mothers house they reappeared.
Then I would see a guy whenever I said it was my ex on the phone. Like a suspicious guy in a trench coat and he kept looking at the car and my boyfriend said if he was a cop he’d arrest him.
Then when I was comming home another time I saw a guy keep looking at me over and over and then disappear into the bushes.
Then again there was a guy in multiple coats at the top of the hill and my boyfriend commented just staring forward in the middle. (Again after I said it was my ex)
So I thought it was either someone who wanted me to stop saying I thought it was my ex or that he paid him.
Also my songs kept turning down or changing
One song I really liked kept skipping, and my phones music would turn off when my boyfriend would come into the room
Along with other little things in my phone
It felt really convincing because it was constant. Every day. Also when i said I thought it could be ghosts the text to speech came on, and said something along the lines of “i can’t hear you, are you talking to me?” But I had even more ridiculous delusions it was like they were taking turns. and i started to hear things and hallucinate. But that’s the one that I question because it felt the most convincing and I was with my bestfriend everyday because I thought I was gonna die and she witnessed a lot with me along with my boyfriend. So that didn’t help
Also my programs would update and I’d try to see what was updating and it’d dissapear
And I had rocks that i thought were thrown at me outside never hit me just around me.
And I had some weird obvious snooping programs on my computer so I thought the person put them as decoys
All the weird things just stopped happening
But when they stopped happening and me and my friend were together I’d try to open the mic recorder and it’d say my mic was being used so i couldnt use it then when I talked about it it stopped. I waited a bit and then the mic recorder was being used again and stopped when I said "see it’s still happening! " and she saw it and then it stayed off from that point on
Most recently, my music on my phone became so bad I almost couldn’t listen to it. The vocals would disappear or the bass would disappear. It was extremely obvious and very, very weird. I thought it was my headphones and I was ready to take them back to the store but then it stopped one day (lasted 2 or 3 days) my music sounded awesome and I was back in business. I KNOW it was these fuckers that control my internet and phone in my fake world. That must be a huge team of people. Anyway, they were fucking with my music. For sure. Letting me know they are there.
Makes one think their delusion is real.
My whole episode with the being abused and tortured by an evil spirit. There are just too many things that don’t add up if it was psychosis. And plenty of other people had bad experiences in that house as well, none near mine but still. I firmly believe there was something evil in that house. I am lucky I was able to escape.