Mine is when people say unusual things (things that sounds like they are about me, Truman Show delusion) and then my friends say they heard it too. It always crawls into my brain and creates delusions, Truman Show delusion. It’s bad, but it doesn’t happen very often- most of what I hear does not get confirmed as real by my friends.
It made me write a hateful journal entry in which I thought someone was reading it- I thought everyone was reading it, because that is what Truman’s syndrome crap does, makes you think that everything you do and say is being observed by everyone. I am able to calm down and get level-headed by hitting the gym, it makes me feel agitated, so working out is the best thing to do. 260 reps later…not so agitated and delusional.
I mean I know they are triggers, I fight them, but they sometimes make me lose some sleep or become agitated, or both, not in that order, the other way around. What I mean is that they make me agitated, then it’s hard going to sleep, then the next day I just want to workout. But that is what I do, and it works! Dammit, it seems to work really well, actually!
yeah I’m kind of in the same boat, but they seem to talk to me telepathically. Every time I mentally glance at them or become aware of their presence. It’s kind of like the Truman show except nobody likes you. On the surface they still seem to treat me like a human being. I think I’m getting better at not triggering the hallucination of telepathy, but that’s when they start saying ■■■■ with their mouths. I was just grabbing a burger and the barkeep at one point muttered “your ■■■■■■.” I think it makes them uncomfortable to see someone who’s adapted to their onslaught. Really I could go on, but I don’t think it’d be right.
In short my triggers are people. I don’t like to think about them or interact with them, unfortunately that’s all I can do to keep the voices at bay. I don’t think I’m supposed to but I think eventually I’ll eventually block this ■■■■ out. Until then my life’s a joke.
I honestly would have to say that my brother is my worst trigger - Lately I have not been doing so great, since I lowered my Risperdal dose below the 2 mg mark - I recently had it raised, but I am not 100% better - still a bit shaky.
My brother triggered a mixed state episode in me the other night, and I am becoming more manic lately.
I am staying away from my brother, at least until I switch over to my new medication and settle down a bit more.
When people mess with me in personal ways as a brunt of a joke or humor that I don’t fully understand. It confuses me the hell out of me and makes me paranoid, like they know all my secrets. And the laughing doesn’t help much either.
A fairly recent addition St Valentine’s day or I guess the whole week. A friend killed herself on the 15th 2011. Although nothing happened between us I had hoped. Also we did go out a few times. Mostly taking it slow due to both being patients. Depending on what she did it most likely was St Val’s day. Her family wont disclose to much about it due to copy cats. Which in my case it’s probably for the best.
Due to St vals specials on TV. Advertising etc tends to aggravate the situation. Symptoms are flaring even now. Somewhat on top of it though but as it gets closer tends to get worse. Although been like four years now so hopefully it’s subsided a lot compared to the last few years.
When people talk about brand names or businesses around me. Two people were doing that today and I almost left the room. I hate advertising it always does a number on me. I try to appear “normal” but it really bothers me.
Well J, your posts all come across as very well thought through as well as a long list of other positive things. Thorough being on of them. You’ve got mindfulness going for you, but maybe you need to try some mindlessness instead. That’s what I do, but I’m used to people being late or slow in general. I’m surprised anything gets done in this world.
Good luck man, I’m sure you’ll eventually learn to cope with this. Give intentional mindlessness a shot next time.
Thank you for that…
Behind the scenes I don’t feel as mindful and with it.
When I’m here in my apartment… calm, with my feet up… well rested… I think I sound like a perfectly logical and reasonable person…
When I spend too much time out in a crowd… I admit… I get edgy and start to get a bit anxious. My logic doesn’t feel as solid… it all starts to waiver a bit.
My job is one thing… I’m working alone a lot. But school gets a bit hard.
I do work on keeping my anger in check… center… patience… let go of the negative… hold on to perspective…
But if you ride in a car with me early in the morning and I get tailgated in the slow lane while I’m speeding… I loose it. Rude tailgaters… It’s monkey fit city.
That’s all sounds like something a neurotypical person could say if given a chance to bitch. I also hate tailgaters, I have a tendency to drive slow, I’m patient and enjoy time in the car.
But yeah man you sound like you’ve definitely got your sz in its place. Gives me hope.
People… That’s my trigger at the moment… It always was a trigger, but right now it’s unbearable, college has tipped me over the edge.
And anger… I’ve been majorly angry four times this month and last, that’s big for me! Normally I have to keep it in check and suppress it but it’s leaking out and it s upsetting me. Makes me feel very out of control and upset because I don like to think myself as dangerous, but if I let m anger out I would have scared quite a few people. Apart from one incident I didn’t thankfully that wasn’t at anyone I knew.
And anything that makes me feel like I’m not being believed, that’s a biggie takes me back to hospital where they thought I was lying a lot. Well actually anything that reminds me of being in hospital…