Another reason my “doctor” said I don’t have sz is because I haven’t had my psychotic break “yet”. (I made a post ranting about how he’s really not a good doctor, I don’t want to go into full detail here”). So that had me thinking… what is it, then?
I thought it was when you had a delusions for more than a few days and you stop eating and you go “insane”. At least that’s how it was defined on the internet but I really don’t know. I’ve had some interesting experiences that I always thought were psych breaks, but I think I’m just being stupid now.
My first delusion was probably in 3 or 4th grade when a girl threw up next to me (emetiphobia). The next few days I would be close to treats because I thought I had become her. I had to check the mirror to make sure it was still me, but I could feel her face forming on me. I had a panic attack for a while thinking I wasn’t me anymore, and that I was going to throw up.
Fast forward to 6th grade. I had a bunch of delusions. One terrifying one was that slender man was hunting me and he was going to kill me. I was so paranoid I felt like I was king to throw up. I frantically touched my back a lot to make sure an X wasn’t there because that’s how he makes his victims. I thought I was really going to die. I wouldn’t eat or go outside or take care of myself except for going to school. There it was worse because I kept asking people if they thought slender man was real and my fears of dying. This lasted maybe a week or less.
Then there was the time I thought I was a god of a world I made up call Alana. I thought I could really make and create things, and I would talk to trees and inadmissible objects because I thought they were speaking to me. It started as imagination as a child, but then it turned into a 2 year delusion all through middle school. I then panicked when my friend told me we’re going to hell if we believe in magic and for the longest time (couple of years) I thought God was going to punish me and I was be tortured.
I have more but I don’t want to make this post long. So what do you think? Is that a psychotic break? I’m sure I got this all wrong, so please explain to me what it’s like for you or what psychotic breaks are.
There are other disorders that revolve around delusions other than schizophrenia such as delusional disorder, depression with delusions, bipolar with delusions, paranoid personality disorder, alcohol or drug abuse with delusions, etc… I’m not schizophrenic but I have anxiety and have gotten delusions and this site is helpful to me because others have similarities in symptoms to my anxiety and delusions.
I’m not sure how to really explain a psychotic break as I’m sure it’s different for other people.
Basically your mind breaks. You can’t use it. You can’t think, and if you do it makes no sense, just gibberish and paranoia all fast like. It’s like you completely snap. You can tell (at least I could) it was a very powerful feeling.
For sure like ‘going insane’. nothing makes sense. Basically, after a psychotic break, all I do is rock back and forth (stereotypical, I know, but also soothing) and my thoughts are completely ■■■■■■ up. I probably can’t explain this as well as I could if I was in a psychotic break, but if I was I wouldn’t be typing, or really communicating whatsoever. You get lost in your head. Nothing is real. Delusions and hallucinations are a normal thing. Everyone is out to get you, ect ect.
I think it’s different for everyone, but a psychotic break is mostly about the significant increase of symptoms (hallucinations, delusions, paranoia, anxiety, rage, depression)
I think a psychotic break can be very personal but certainly it involves not being able to think clearly. The volume of delusional/paranoid/crazy thoughts is overwhelming and few thoughts seem tethered to reality.
For me, there were a few days ramping up to what was a psychotic break. I had some paranoia and delusions of grandeur, then went off the deep end. I was pretty certain I was being investigated then certain I had died. I then lived the next few years in purgatory. Good times!
Imagine breaking your leg such that you couldn’t walk. I’d describe a psychotic break as your mind breaking such that you couldn’t control your thoughts.
It’s hard to describe. A total break from reality and normal/rational thinking, I guess. For me, it’s when I’m full-on delusional, completely lost my mind, completely unable to function in any sort of way. I also tend to hallucinate (auditory and visual) during psychotic breaks. It’s very intense psychosis. I’ve had three of them, and they all required hospitalization.
When you read your medical intake report that labels you a psychosis nos and you start thinking back to what you said to the pdoc which doesn’t make sense to you but you realize it still doesn’t make sense. Hope I’m being clear.
I’ve had a bunch of things like that happen to me. I think I mentioned the time I thought I was someone else? My mind was gone. All I felt was crying and absolute fear. Every time something like this happened I remember grabbing at my skin and writhering close to tears because I really thought it was real.
Especially the slenderman episode… that was really bad. Horrible honestly. I was SO paranoid I felt SICK. Sick like I’ve never felt before. Like I’d just experienced something traumatic, or a bomb was going to explode under me any minute. It was awful… couldn’t function.
