We need to work together

Well I had a bit of a breakdown the last few days, in which I collapsed and told my partner about my condition so she would understand the swings of my mood over the two days we spent together. She has somewhat of a background studying psychology, and her day job is taking care of autistic children/adults, so I assumed she would be understanding. Firstly, she asked “How long do you think you’ve been sick?”, in which I replied that it isn’t me thinking, but me knowing, and it isn’t nessecarily me being sick, it’s more of a part of me which I didn’t understand until about a year ago when I realized my sz. I see it more as something that modern science doesn’t fully understand yet, and so I am not a big fan of conventional treatment. She almost acts like I’m using it as an excuse to not work at a normal job, and she says that instead of reaching out to friends and forums for like-minds and help, that I should see a therapist. I am not against therapy altogether, but I am very much in control of my situation, and saying that to her started an argument in which she stated that instead of reaching out online I should see someone because I obviously need help. The funny thing, though, is that I do not want or need to be helped. I just need to be able to have discussions without outbursts and finger-pointing when it comes to the sz and I also need to be able to have intellectual conversations about cosmology and what it is to be a human in this universe.

My point in this post is to basically just say that people need to be more gentle and aware of our sensitivity. Instead of screaming bloody murder when a loved one has an issue, we should come together in harmony and understanding. Instead of judging someone who admits to having an issue, we should work with them and not throw them under the bus.

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asking you to seek professional help is not “throwing someone under a bus” i do not like the medications but i take them because i meet my family halfway. they understand that i’m not well enough to get a job so they helped me apply for disability. right now you are not meeting anyone halfway at all. you talk about your life in romantic, dare i say it, delusional terms. if you want people to get on with you then meet them half way. either get a job and persue your studies in your own time or apply for disability. see a therapist and get on meds. if they don’t agree with you then fine but at least you’ll have tried to get help. as right now you just sound selfish and delusional in my honest opinion and that’s not meant as an insult by the way but from someone who is trying to help you.

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Wow…well thanks for the response?

In the OP, I stated that I neither want or need help, and you tell me that I sound delusional and that I, in fact, need help. I shouldn’t feel the need, especially on a forum of this nature, to stand up for myself when seeking like-minds, but in my defense, I said that instead of judging someone who admits to having an issue (in my case, even talking about this stuff is difficult because most people aren’t prepared or expecting to hear it) we should work with them. I said nothing about not meeting half way. I shouldn’t have to do ANYTHING that my intuition tells me not to do, and in this case that includes seeing a professional or taking meds. I like to think I have this under my own control, but it’s the worst when getting talked to like less-than-equal as you are talking to me.

I’ll be taking my leave now. This forum obviously isn’t any help, as I am only insulted in the same manner which I am offline.

Sometimes professionals cope differently when it is in their personal lives. It’s somewhat unusual for me to recommend this book in the diagnosed section however I’m wondering if it may be beneficial for your partner to take a look at it.

http://www.leapinstitute.org/ - under resources are free videos on using LEAP
LEAP is a way of communicating to build trust. Listen-Empathize-Agree-Partner.

http://dramador.com/ - Dr. Xavier Amador is a clinical psychologist whose brother had schizophrenia. He is the founder of the LEAP Institute. Wrote the book: I’m Not Sick I Don’t Need Help! Can buy from his website.
Search Xavier Amador and LEAP on youtube.com and you should find some long videos

Your partner may be trying to motivate you however it doesn’t seem like her current approach is working.

Have you ever given medications a try? Sometimes they can help with things that you may currently be unaware of dealing with. They can help with anxiety and mood swings.

Reaching out for help online is a good first step. Therapy is not a bad idea either.

While I understand wanting to discuss cosmology and the universe as my son likes these types of conversations, it is not something that myself or perhaps your partner is interested in discussing. As much as you want your partner to work with you then maybe you need to also work with your partner. It is possible that part of your intuition is tied into schizophrenia. That doesn’t make it right or wrong. It is what you feel. Maybe give therapy a try and it may give you the opportunity to talk out some of your ideas and get a different perspective on them that is not emotionally charged.

A lot of the people who studied psychology have their own mental problems or are not well adjusted themselves, they studied their own problems. The people who have a degree in this subject and work in another field making a lot less, plus deal with the loans, are the bestest people.

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