Ugly thoughts about people against my will

Can’t stop my brain from going haywire, I don’t know why I’m having such ugly thoughts about people, but it’s agonising me.

I read that the sub conscious creates all the thoughts and your conscious is there to judge them. why has my sub conscious turned into the biggest pr*ck ever.

Why can’t I do anything about this, I’m locked into a 24/7 mental battle against my thoughts.

I can’t help it.

Has anyone else gone through this?!?

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Yes. I’m going through it too. In my case, the ugly thoughts I am thinking become apparent to the people in my vicinity. Most people realize I don’t mean it, and they make allowances, but it still alienates them. I’ve gotten to where I have as little social interaction as possible because of this problem. If I had my preferences I wouldn’t have any interaction at all. My ambition is to get an apartment in public housing and only leave when I have to - mainly to get groceries. If I could afford to have my groceries delivered I wouldn’t go out at all.
I’m 58 years old, and I’ve had this problem for 35 years. It’s good that you’re talking about this when you are young. If you can, talk to a therapist about it. Be assertive. Don’t let your therapist dismiss your problem as delusional. Your therapist might be skeptical at first, but maybe with time and effort he or she will come to understand. I’m considering getting ECT for my problem.

I go through this lots, brain makes up all kinds of things that will never happen, go on for hours with it.

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I’m in hospital and my brain keeps thinking evil things about one girl in particular. She literally started crying.

I’m in pieces today over this, it’s ■■■■■■■ horrible, I don’t want to make other people feel self conscious, I know what that feels like and i would never wish it upon anyone. So it kills me that my brain is doing this.

35 years, that’s a long time to cope with this problem, you must be incredibly strong.

Thought broadcasting is horrible

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I feel the same way. One time I had a room mate who just quit staying in my room with me. It is a trial for the people who bear the brunt of our problem. There usually isn’t any open hostility in it, but I still feel like I should make it up to them in some way. If I had any money I might give them some. I’ve heard one way to defuse social tension is to help out picking up after people and generally help straightening things out. I know it isn’t always possible, but you can keep your eyes open for that type of opportunity. I do a little work cleaning the bathrooms at the clubhouse where I live. I get paid for it, but I think it also helps people see that I don’t think I am better than them.

To difuse tension between folks, sometimes a good place to start is to find similarities/ things in common.
Once you have that, the rest kinda falls into place.

I have several pieces of advice.
First, try to replace negative thoughts with positive ones.
Second, when you are having these thoughts, try to empty your head and quieten them.
Third, try to put your mind off bad things by doing stuff.
I hope my advice is helpful.(this is to tiredout)

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I’m in hospital, so oppurtunitys are rare but I’ll always do the sink full of dishes if I see them! Just I’m too panicked to even talk to people properly, anxiety at its finest, not helped by this situation!

I’m too fearful to talk to people, I have to try though even though it terrifies me

Thank you for the advice Erez, sound advice! I really appreciate you taking time out of your day to try come up with solutions for me

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Hello Erez! Good advice!

I’ve noticed that you often specify who you’re replying to at the end of your post. Just a tip. If you want to reply to a specific post, you can click the “Reply” button directly below that post on the right side. This will notify the person you’re replying to and make it visible that it’s a reply to that specific post. Have a good day! :blush:

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I was always mute when I first got in the hospital, so says one psych tech who knew me well.
You don’t have to talk to people, somethings come natural.


Maybe you could use this opportunity to air things out with a therapist. See if a therapist can offer any insight to your problem. I’ve found that therapy in mental hospitals is kind of done on an assembly live basis, and your pdoc won’t give you much time unless you’re assertive with him or her about this problem.

Yes Treebeard but sometimes I do this and it is not visible( to me at least) that its directed at
the person I’m replying to.That’s why I add the info to whom the reply is directed.


You can take my advice or not, depending on how it suits you. Just be careful that you don’t end up like me - 58 years old and sitting in an assisted living center, wondering where my life went.

crimby this is not always under our control.
If you have health problems it changes the equation.
I advise people to do the best they can.
I for example as I am now can’t play chess, but I guess I am able to play tennis.
I can’t hold a job or study or engage in some of my preferred hobbies.
But I do what I can.

I totally understand. I have all sorts of thoughts against my will that I cannot control. I agree with the others that you should bring it up with a therapist. Hopefully you will get it sorted out and find some peace in your struggle. Best wishes in the hospital and with your recovery.

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I have been doing that treebeard, maybe I’m getting it wrong, but I’m on mobile so I don’t know if that’s anything to do with it!

No, you seem to be doing it right! :blush: