I am in Toronto. Do you come here often?
I like to stay in Toronto every couple of months. I stay in some ikea furnished condo for a weekend and wander the city by myself and just get lost in my thoughts.
I live in the middle of absolutely nowhere and as quiet and peaceful as it is there is something I love so much about being smack dab in the middle of chaos and just finding my way through it. Maybe that doesn’t make sense.
Relax, you are not wghat you weigh. I know for me I never feel good enough, but I am. I never want to be in the hospital again, so I must do “my” part which is to be healthy. I can’t blame drs for med problems if I’m drinking alcohol…not saying you do or eating lots of sugar. Our whole body has to be in tune. Heck, I’m on an ass ton of meds but mainly they are all due to me developing both TD and long qtc. Or prolonged interval. For abilify side effects. I realized the last time I was in the hospital when they were talking about a pacemaker/defibrillator combo that I had to do everything I could to take care of me cuzdrs ex’s put me there. I take my meds, make sure ekgs are done and accept responsibility of nutrition and stress. I’ve been under a lot of stresss, but have now removed the toxicity away. I’m better than that. I deserve to be the best I can be even though I’m on disability. I’m sorry I let go of unicorns and rainbows a long time ago and hope I didn’t offend anyone. But we are still humans that can accomplish more than others believe possible. I have finally accepted, I’ll always be different, and nobody is ever going to understand what or how m mind works. I work out 5 days a week and reall helps. My dr says I’m still too anxious but really really have had a lot of ■■■■ thrown my way recently. I dont know why I’m rambling but please take care of your body. It’s the only one you have
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Your avatar looks like the youtuber Ola Lily
She’s so pretty. I’ll take the compliment 
we definitely have the same chin.
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i am from china ,;but now i live in belgium
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u know dalian ,near the border of japan
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I joined weight watchers, I’m trying to lose 70 pounds…that’s how much gained since being on Antipsychotics this past year. 160 to 230
Ouch. It’s hard isn’t it? My highest was 230 and I was able to get down to 140 in 6 months and stay there for nearly 3 years. Then with meds, my cysts, a little mania, a hard hit of depression and a lot of lost hope I basically ate 40 lbs back in within a year. I need a change. I’m here for support if you need it
Wow, we’re very similar.
I’m also just coming back from a long b/p episode. I somehow managed to gain a ton of weight in that time.
I hope this time I’m also done, for good.
It’s been hard to lose weight, because anxiety and stress are cause my appetite to be all over the place.
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Winter doesn’t help either. It’s like I was getting ready for hibernation and filling up for warmth. but then i kept preparing while all the other animals were asleep. And now they’re about to wake up hungry and have shed their winter weight and I’m a blob.
When I was manic I would use my cardio equipment at midnight. Now they’re covered in dust. Stability has always made me fat.
Oh yes, it’s hard not to gain weight in the winter, especially during holidays.
Well, hopefully one of these day you can dust if off, again. Although, working out in the middle of the night probably isn’t the best idea.
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No it’s awful. I was such a messy person. Staying up all night painting and rearranging my home and exercising. I took up a new business so I could stay up all night working and then during the day I would have my kiddos or go to my other job. It became so bad I was pretending to be another person in a different city when I escaped my day to day life and I started to burn my furniture and redecorate my home. Halfway through I hit a bad depression and everything fell apart I couldn’t finish my house and I shut out everyone in both my lives. I was on auto pilot for nearly a year and just ate, smoked weed to sleep a lot and played with my kids.
Now that I feel more stable finally I want to get into shape in a healthy way. No bulimia no starving no double life anything…just basic normal boring diet and exercise. Lmao.
Wow, that sounds awful. 
I hope you don’t ever have to go through that, again.
There’s nothing wrong with exercising. It’s very good for your mind and body, so long as you do the right amount of it, not excessive.
Glad to hear you’re doing so well now. I think if you try and keep that mentality, you should be just fine.
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Thank you. I wish the same for you. I think I may dust my elliptical off tomorrow
I’m on a mission to fit into my regular clothes again. Care to join me is
hi yuying, I am from china too, and I AM LIVING IN us now. what’s kind of medicine do you take now?
Hope your surgery will go well and help you.
I have had cysts too…
I was 50 kg last time I was hospitalised.
That is my weight normally.
Olanzapine made me put on weight to become a 73kg chick on approximately 161cm.
Just by changing medication to latuda I went to 63 kg and then I was 60 kg for a year and then came down to 55 kg .
Then I went down to 53 kg but then came my birthday and my parents gave me many kg of Swedish lollies and I got cake so after my birthday I went back to 55 kg.
My boyfriend hid the rest of my lollies and now I am 54 kg.
I do approximately five minutes of yoga every morning but do not do other exercise at the moment.
I have done things around home that are naturally exercise…
I have a normal bmi now but still rather go back to 50 kg but even 53 kg I can be pretty pleased with.
I started having weight watchers bar for lunch such as coconut delight and a piece of fruit.
Belvita biscuit for breakfadt maybe cereal and yoghurt sometimes too.
Normal dinner.
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im in the same boat as you. i need to lose about 50 pounds and im a recovering bulimic. hard stuff
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Bulimia is the worst kind of bitch. She just takes takes takes from you and offers you so little in return. And somehow we are so deprived of everything else we accept it graciously.
I still have nightmares of my teeth falling out in to the toilet after a bad purge. Sigh.
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Five minutes of morning yoga! That sounds like the perfect energizer before starting your day but not too long that you will flake out on it.
I think I may start doing 5 mins of morning yoga. Who knows. Maybe it will lead to 5 mins of bedtime yoga.
I haven’t had a weight watcher bar before. Weight watchers used to be notoriously bad for sugar and empty carbs that I’m never gave them a thought. I really love quest bars. They’re like my favourite safe food. Along with plain yogurt, plain rye toast, or egg whites with hot sauce.
I’be been eating better for the last few days. It’s maybe a combination between motivation to fit into my clothes because literally nothing I own fits me except two black pairs of track pants (so not flattering) and the nice weather. I need spring to stick aroundddddd