Sa.
Im having trouble with time.
Blackouts
Lapses in memory
No i dont take my meds.
Ive mostly functioned without until i didnt. Orderly fed at that point.
But use to i would forget it’s Friday. Or Monday. .
Now ill forget it’s 2019
Or not 1999.
Time warps
Time distortions
I also have tinnitus and am considerbly deaf as of late.
Im 40 . no. 41.
Do the math.
40.
Since 17 this wasnt too bad.
The voices.
We work well together
Until we don’t
I fear having narcissistic behaviors because ive been affected by that before
But it’s only cuz i cant seem to focus
Makes me seem like i dont care
But i care so much ot scares me
Until i dont
Then im destructive
I have anxiety that grows into the world
Then im exhausted
No energy
No telling when i sleep .
I do
But im not sure which parts im asleep for and which im not conscious for. Meaning
There have been many times i feel like i wake up from a dream or nightmare but ive been talking and carrying on for no telling how long. . and ill go. . i think i knew this… But. I just woke up. Feeling as if ive been awake for 4or 5 days.
Dragging to the bed.
Where are you going ?
To bed. I need sleep.
Its like 9 in the morning. We just woke up at 8.
And im like what’s today?
Panicked because i probably overslept for work
Its Saturday.
Oh.
Wait.
What year?
2019.
■■■■.
My daughter is at her dentist appt.
Race out the door.
It’s not til noon.
No wonder her and her dad or the. Saturday dentist is even here.
I don’t like meds. Like screaming on mute.
Anyhow im new.
I deleted facebook because im scared im gona embarass my self
I tip toe every day.
Dont like waking people up because it’s more comfortable when everyone’s asleep despite how much i love people