These are my voices

DX'd - Sz/SzA
1

Hi,

I was just wondering what kind of voices people hear.

I consistently hear the same voices.

1st, I hear a voices that says he is the devil himself. He’s really scary and says I will suffer forever. He says he will torment me forever, even after I am dead. He says he is “better than God.” He says he is the reason why people have knowledge and so he is the reason we “live in such a technological paradise.” So he is to thank for all the technology in the world.

2nd, I hear a nice voice that says he is “a friend.” Although I doubt that he is because he won’t tell me his name or anything about himself. As long as I take my meds he sounds nice and tries to help me no matter how bad things seem. However, I have doubts that he actually likes me because if I stop taking my meds then he starts sounding just as mean as the devil voice. However, he did help me get through college. I never would have graduated from college without the help of this nice voice.

3rd, I hear a voice that sounds like a friend of mine who died a few years ago. He sounds like a friend of mine named Tony who died of a heart problem. He is the only voice I kind of trust. This voice actually makes my mouth move, so when I hear this voice and my mouth moves and makes sounds it seems to people observing me that I am talking to myself.

I’ve also heard a voice that says he’s a “catholic.” And this voice also hates me.

Also, when I think a bad thought about someone I often hear their voice disparaging me. Like I’ll think a bad thought about a basketball player on TV, and then I’ll hear that basketball player’s voice in my head telling me I’m a “jerk” or something like that. It could be anybody I’m thinking about. I’ll hear their voice calling me names if I think a bad thought about them.

Well, those are most of my voices. I hear them even when I take meds, although they are a lot quieter when I take my meds. Clozaryl is a real Godsend. It is the only AP that has made my voices quieter. I’ve tried Geodon, Abilify, Zyprexa, Risperdal, and Haldol, and Clozaryl is the only one that works. The voices are so loud without it that I can’t even sleep. I’ve been up 4 days straight when I stopped taking my APs.

Anyone else want to share their voices? Do meds make them go away altogether or do you still hear them a bit?

Thanks.

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Very good insightful view of your voices… I get more visuals…and most audibles are mostly just noises …Last voice I heard… Offered a deal not a soul deal… A years off my life deal… It was in my head unlike most of my audibles which seem to come from outside… We chatted through my thoughts…and he was gone… Terrible cackle… I don’t know if I was in control of my responses… Feels like I was though…

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When I hear voices, it usually is the voice of a woman I once knew. It is usually her in a conversation with other people throughout the day. It’s been awhile since I really heard it. Thank goodness for the meds working. The other voices I hear stem from the telepathy delusion where I think I’m hearing people’s thoughts.

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By the way happy cake day flameoftherhine!

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I have 3 voices: goddess Annette, and her two assistants Isidore (male angel) and Louisa (female angel).

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Uhhh I have a lot of different ones. I have the ones that I now assume are different parts of myself who are human, and I have different relationships with all of them, then there’s the one I refer to as God because I always get such a warm and loving feeling talking to it and it is very kind wise and helpful, then there is another sort of multitude of voices I refer to as the demons because they have a very dark energy and are incredibly cruel. Talking to them it feels like they cannot get enough of my suffering, like they are starving, a bottomless pit, and they want more more suffering like it is the most delicious thing ever. A swarming hive of evil.

Only Risperidone & geodon took them away no other AP did. Off AP it’s pretty much completely reliant on how much sleep I’m getting & how much stress I’m under as to how active/intrusive they are. Things have been fairly mild lately. Haven’t heard from the demons in weeks. Maybe even over a month now.

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Hello! Thank you for sharing your story.
I was originally going to post a similar topic until I saw your topic today. Thank you for helping me to know more about my schizophrenia; it’s always amazing to learn from others who went through similar experiences.

I also have visual hallucinations. Their nature changes all the time- but some remain the same. Ever since I had hallucinations since I was 17, I would see these girls, but they didn’t have faces or any body features, but they had short shadows. They were very friendly, so I didn’t mind when I was hallucinating their ‘colours’- green and red. There are also these very tall, dark shadows who identify themselves as people to torture me. They told me to simply call them, ‘he’, and the female one, ‘she’. Their names are so simple that I haven’t forgotten their names. Other hallucinations float as shadows and they haven’t told anything about their names.

The girls generally were friendly at the beginning of my schizophrenia, but these days, after a massive psychotic breakdown about a week ago, I’m having episodes daily. The girls told me, “You didn’t save us when we yelled for help. Now we’re going to torture you, too.” So, they declared that they would always appear when there objects coloured green and red. I didn’t think much of it after they said so, but when I saw that there were green and red objects around me, I panicked. My university’s colours include red. The little book I got when I got into university from the department of English is also red. My pens are green and red. There are so many green things in my house. It’s very scary- so that’s why I try to avoid as much as I can. I actually found that green is more easy to tackle with, but red always gets to me. It’s so frustrating. I can’t tell my parents about it because they would tell me to ‘pray’.

So, I have a lot of internal voices. I also hear external audio hallucinations, but mostly they are crashing, booming, and falling sounds. Usually they go hand in hand; usually, external voices start before internal voices come in. The big shadows say negative things. “You’re worthless”, “you don’t deserve to live”, “we’re going to kill you”- and most common command hallucination is this: “jump out of your window”.
The girls, now hostile, told me, “We’re here…so you better watch out.” “You don’t deserve anything.”

The hallucinations come with tactile hallucinations, too. They’re so scary. One time they were ants crawling in my arm, and I felt as if someone was chocking my neck. I also felt pain in my stomach- felt like someone punched my stomach, and the hallucinations would scratch me until I do something that they told me to do.

I’m seeing new hallucinations, too. I am seeing this monster with two heads, with smiley faces, and a huge body with two legs. This is so frightening…
Thank you for sharing your experience with all of us here. Thinking of you. <3