Feel a little down today again. My motivation levels are dropping again. Haven’t got the desire to paint anymore and when reading I’m restless
On Wednesday past I had a massive reaction to an argument with my husband. He tried my patience and I snapped. I screamed repeatedly and threw a book and pillows at him. Then I wailed over and over at the top of my voice. It was unearthly. I felt like I was observing myself from above and couldn’t believe the involuntary noises coming from my mouth. I think my husband was shocked too although he didn’t express it.
Later when we talked ok again we thought it was my sza that caused my madness. I was exhausted for a whole day afterwards
On this Wednesday coming in have an appointment with my mental health social worker. Almost forgot about it.
My prescription for my meds running out on Friday so have to see my pdoc soon too.
I missed the connection to mental health workers so looking forward to both appointments.
Next month my husband and I moving house to another suburb so will have to find a new pdoc as my one is too far away.
Sometimes I forget I have sza. But then I get moments like the above when it peeks it’s head out. Alien remains a background presence.