I’ve realized being tired of it and fighting it just gives it more power, acceptance is the first step in recovery and the most simple step. Simple, but not easy.
Yeah that’s a lesson I just recently learned. I’ve been exploring it. That is the possibilities of my symptoms getting more acquainted with the horrors.
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Exactly…coping mechanisms. It’s a long journey, but it does get better as long as you keep a progressive attitude.
I feel the same way, sometimes. I’ve heard of people believing the voices are telepathy, I just don’t believe in the ability, it’s just voices. The problem with manufactured psychotic drugs is the human brain doesn’t work like something “manufactured.” that’s what makes you different from me, and me different than you. If the drugs you’re on now aren’t working I would talk to your doctor and try and work out something that works for you. Just try and remember the voices are wrong,
You are supposed to be alive, or you wouldn’t have been born. People will miss you, people do love you. You’re not alone, I think those of us who have Schizophrenia have been in this position. It’s hard sitting and listening to the negative voices. I know, almost all my voices are negative, or they leave.
I find ways to distract myself like @darksith suggested. I use writing as a method of releasing stress, I don’t always show people what I write, some of it is just personal, or getting out aggravation…there are other ways but this is just how I deal with it. I also use music to drown out the world around me, though this doesn’t always work with the noise inside my head, sometimes music with words causes more of a headache when I have too much noise, thankfully not all the music I listen to has words.
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That was very well put. Acceptance was the hardest part for me it turns out. Sure… when I was told… I heard the words, I could understand what that meant, but that doesn’t mean I really accepted it.
Not until much later.
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Sorry you are having a difficult time too @martin, you are just as important as anyone else, and I don’t want you to feel ignored.
I hope you can find a distraction to help you from what bothers you, and I just want you to know that we care.
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Not believing the consequences the voices threaten me with or the threats the voice characters in my head (God to hell, devil to sin etc.) imply stops 98% of the voices I was hearing. It was recently non-stop even in my dreams before that.
I would probably start hearing them again if I stopped taking Abilify. I think I enjoy the lucidity of being in control, and I feel just as in control on medication as off medication. The only difference is that I have really vivid hallucinations. In other words, if I hallucinated from being off Abilify it would no longer be a hallucination, it would be real. My thoughts or opinions don’t really shift, my entire perspective and reality shifts. Off medication I behave differently than on medication. I behave differently almost as if I was brainwashed to behave differently, and ancient questions about my actual power resurfaces which I constantly hide from. The fact that I have proven these hallucinations were paranormal and supernatural. That there was a demonic force which was oppressing me and that psychiatry only fed into it. While medications appeared to normalize me, it was me in fact being normal amidst constant interference with my brain chemistry. My mother’s political activism and her descent into madness thereafter still causes me to question this. How I was abused in the hospital so much that I had a traumatic reaction to it, and how hospitals when I went to them never seemed to work to stabilize me because of the medications I was put on in them. While on the surface they appear to be set up to help people, appearances are deceiving us. Because you can be in any environment and be perfectly crazy without one soul knowing the difference. I’m afraid to be sane. I’m afraid to be living like this and I want to stop it all.
I feel like the most misunderstood person in the universe.
You’d have to be crazy to believe the things I do anyways.
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well i’m not dx as schiz but i do hear voices but i don’t believe i’m telepathic. personally i don’t believe with the amount of programming i’ve had that it’s actually possible or even if there were more of the abuse and brainwashing. it’s just personalities in my splintered mind i think. hence the reason they needed to bug my phone, which stupidly i got rid of. it was to trigger more voices and different topics to berate me with. not difficult to figure out at all. i don’t actually believe that telepathy is possible but i do believe you can mimic it, hence the reason they come back every now and again, to add more voices to the fray which i also don’t believe in. it’s funny how, i say i don’t believe in it then they come back and then the voices say oh no, you weren’t telepathic then but you are now…i find that very convenient indeed.
I hear ■■■■ every day that makes me wonder whether thought broadcasting is real. This disease sucks.
Amen, waking up to random but systematic numbers being whispered really helps me be excited about the day.
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Sounds like you’re dealing with a nasty episode right now…fight to maintain lucidity. It’s an exhausting struggle, I realize but don’t give up hope. New research is being conducted every day. Who knows, maybe as soon as next year, or even next month they could have a crazy breakthrough.
I mean they just discovered schizophrenia is actually more a cluster of genetic conditions than one mental illness. Even that’s progress.
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i never got numbers like that but i just remember waking up in the morning for many days to “Ohhhh do you think we would actually leave you? HA were going to terrorise you all day everyday”
i got used to ignoring that lol
My similar experiences happen at night…they do NOT want me to go to sleep. I try to ignore, but sometimes I get so caught up in it all that I want to know what will happen next…in fear yes, but curiosity usually overcomes my thoughts.
ah yeah, i used to get very curious about it as well, and when i thought about listening to what they wanted to say they would be like “oh so you want to know now hey? we can tell you” and blah blah blah there they go on a tanjent. or sometimes they would say “you need to be quiet, were angry with you and do not want to speak with you , we are busy discussing stuff”
just bizarre
I wish they’d ignore me…besides one a couple weeks ago they just mess w/me but not full on torment…thank God. When I joined the forum it was after a full night of about 10-12 of them in pairs just torturing me, and taking turns…phew anyway they’ve decreased in intensity. Getting better though but my curiosity will get to me overtime. I work on coping mechanisms to escape fear, but my curiosity grabs a lot of my energy. Time will help.
yeah best way to think about it is whether they say good or bad things. in the end its always bad. there useless. i would just acknowledge that they are there , make peace and let em fade to the background
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After an hour or two I usually tell them to **** off, or kill me. I don’t believe they can kill me btw nor do I care. Sooner separation from the problem will evolve over time. Stimuli and response create habits even if we’re not aware of them.
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mine are just non stop threats which so far have never come to pass but then i haven’t made a significant dent in them yet or a significant amount of money. we’ll see what happens when i do.