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So I make a pretty modest salary at my job


#1

If I qualify for rehabilitative employment on Disability (which I recently applied for), I will bring in 430 Euros a week at most. My question is, is this enough for the modern man when dating a woman? I really don’t feel up to anything more stressful or demanding at the moment then what I am doing. And, as you say, it is a different world out there now. We have virtually killed traditional gender roles. They want a partner instead of a complement and all of that. (Although, my sister is a stay at home mom and manages just fine). Is my salary enough to form a relationship with a man or do they care now about how much a woman makes? It is such a cynical, unromantic time to live. I just hate it. It wasn’t like this in my mother’s generation…


Do you think it is okay to choose a less demanding/stressful but also less prestigious/accomplished/even lowly job if you struggle with low mood?
#2

@Diana_Ross7 u the best Diana


#3

It depends on the man. I started dating my husband knowing he was disabled and had a low income. But we hit it off right away so I knew I wanted to date him regardless of money. So the man who is right for you won’t care how much you earn.


#4

Id rather have someone whos stars match up with mine, then their bank accounts :wink:


#5

My question to you is do you really want someone looking at your bank balance than you?


#6

But it is the way of the world now right? Here in Ireland, even those with a dual income and I mean two great careers find it difficult to get a mortgage. So maybe men have been re-engineered/conditioned by the economy to consider a woman’s financial status (and women’s liberation has helped along the way in that regard in causing them more and more to expect strong, independent women. Even though we’re not all like that to be honest). So I worry maybe frankly I am too poor for a man.


#7

My husband and I are both disabled but we are making it work. Love will find a way.


#8

Everyone is different, you just need to find the right man for you


#9

I don’t think it is necessarily the way of the world. But like you I do feel a little insecure of my financial status. But I’m currently unemployed. But to the right person he’s not going to see your bank balance because he’s looking for someone special not a bank balance. I was a little insecure about it but the person I’m seeing is really supportive so it’s not that big of a deal.


#10

You seem awfully insecure about your job status.
Don’t worry about it!

I think some men might be looking for a woman who can be financially stable, as in, not lounge around at home all day and demand half his paycheck for shopping clothes, but I don’t think anyone will look at you and go “ew. She doesn’t make enough money”.

The fact that you’re willing to work, and that you have a job you care about, speaks more.


#11

Have you ever considered a man that wants you to assume a “traditional gender role”, is going to treat you like (shit)?

Ask one of the sweet old ladies that grew up during the era your so fond of,

A man that wants you to be his subordinate instead of a partner is dangerous.

You need to find someone you care about and want a partnership with,

Then, later, discuss how you’d prefer to stay at home,

It might be possible.


#12

I disagree. Women’s Liberation has added more stress, pressures and demands upon me than the old system of coverture ever might have. I wouldn’t believe in leftist propaganda about what has been the status quo for thousands of years and has helped to build civilisation itself ie: tradition.


#13

You’re willing yourself a sad, sad life.


#14

Why so? We’re all different. I am more of a traditionalist in my personal life than a progressive. I am a progressive for others. I’m sympathetic to liberal causes. But in terms of romance, I like heterosexuality, tradition, the conventional gender roles…


#15

Be honest with yourself.

You don’t want to work.

Women’s lib is a scapegoat for your own insecurities,

Don’t drag feminism through the dirt because of your hang ups,

And for the love of gods, stop posing this over and over.


#16

I don’t see the point in clinging to tradition merely because it’s tradition and it’s always been that way.

You’re entitled to your preferences, but if your preference is that you want a strong man who can support you, you should be honest with the men you’re dating about that. Maybe put it in your dating profile.


#17

I’m sympathetic to women’s lib but for myself, it has made life stressful. It has made me unhappy. I feel like it is about the homogenisation of the genders. I feel like it was a lie as other conservative thinkers have often proven (Phyllis Schlafly for one) But It’s a complicated issue. There are even other feminists that decry what modern feminism has become; Christina Hoff Sommers, Camille Paglia etc. There are other dissident voices. You can treat it like a religion if you like but it is a hugely contentious issue. It’s much more than simply advocating for the equality of men and women. It can’t be reduced to that…


#18

I just don’t want you to get stuck in a relationship with someone who treats you like a subordinate and doesn’t respect you.


#19

It is often misandrist. It has extremist elements I am uncomfortable with ie. The S.C.U.M manifesto or the Society for Cutting Up Men. Feminism has dragged itself through the dirt and doesn’t dare speak out against reverse sexism towards men…


#20

I just don’t understand the suspicion levelled at men. I have always found them to be very pleasant. I would never choose a man who doesn’t respect me. And just because we live a traditional lifestyle, it doesn’t mean I am subordinate. My sister is a stay at home mom, my mother was a homemaker, and they have had strong marriages. I like complementarianism as opposed to the idea that both partners as you say must perform the same function and throw the kids in daycare. It’s a bit fascist IMO.