I want to go off my meds so bad. I think I’m going to. Maybe not flush them down the toilet but stop taking them. I want to feel alive. I am so ■■■■■■■ lonely I moved away from home and my only social contact outside my family is calling friends. I have a small amount of friends and they are all sick of me except my best friend who is the only person I can talk with completely uninhibited. I am crushed by loneliness. I cannot function. I spend all day at Starbucks throwing back shots of espresso with my parents money until I start hearing voices and talking to myself and then I don’t feel lonely but people stare at me and probably think I’m homeless. I am a broken person. I want to go off my meds. I will feel whole. Life had grand meanings before medication, and I felt like I had a purpose, even if it was frightening. I don’t think you guys can talk me out of it. I’m going to stop taking my meds. But I hate the hospital so that’s a downside.
My friends literally don’t like who I am as a person and just still talk to me because they feel obligated to because they think I m crazy and unstable.
I don’t think I actually have schizophrenia, I think the meds are poison and keeping me sick and that’s a fact.
Yah thats not true. People aren’t that nice. Stay on your meds, you’ve been stable for like a whole year thats amazing. I thought you really liked vraylar? You sound a little depressed too so watch out for that before you make any rash decisions
Yesterday you knew how much better your life has gotten since being on Vrylar. Do you not remember three years ago when you literally electrocuted your brain because you were so desperate to feel better? Do you really want to go back to that just so other people find you more entertaining?
I lost a lot of friends when I went on meds. Lots of people thought I became boring. But my life is now better in every possible way, and I’ve made new friends who like the version of me I became on meds.
More from you yesterday
I don’t care what I said. Self-effacing… At ONE with the drive… Into the black moon//the light of atonement!
NIRC: Navigating and Integrating Consensus Reality. Challenging stuff. Madness and civilization in a dance of union and separation.
Worth mentioning: Improperly disposed of meds pollute the environment. We especially don’t need psych meds in our water supply, so please don’t ever flush them. Take them back to your pharmacy if you must get rid of them and they will dispose of them safely.
I recommend staying on the meds and easing up on the caffeine consumption (this is coming from someone who loves her coffee).
Instant withdrawal from meds is hell + relapse psychosis doesn’t seem like a fun time either, and overdoing it with caffeine makes me feel like making rash decisions that could negatively impact my life, too.
Call 911 right now! You’re speaking gibberish
Or text 471471 it’s the crisis text line
Stay on your meds!
If you want to come off the med’s do it with a doctor’s supervision. Personally, I’ve had good luck with Geodon and Seroquel. They control my symptoms without dulling my mind. Have you tried those? What you’re experiencing could be a letdown from the caffeine highs you’ve been getting. When I was in the army I used to tank up on caffeine, and spend the morning in a kind of reverie, and then that evening I was very depressed. It was only a few years later that I realized that the depression was the downside of a caffeine high.
You don’t sound well. If you’re trying to make a case that you are OK and well enough to go off meds you’re making a bad case for sanity. It would probably get worse off meds. Just my two cents.
Remember your goals for the future. You want to become an NP. You can’t do that unless you’re stable on meds. You have been doing very well. You can have the life you want. Staying on meds is part of the equation, though.
meds are ur only savoiur in this world and with this problem …I am lonely as well but I take that over crazzieee and insane mind …I have no friends and it’s hard but what can I do I can’t fly planes meet my sister it’s sad but I am not going to burn my only hope to recovery and that’s med
I understand wanting to come off meds. Not long ago I was so desperate to cone off mine because of the negatives. It was awful. But instead I opted to try adding one more to try to counter those side effects. You know, it worked!
Perhaps you can try that. Abilify is known to be activating. The answer might be two APs, something to work past this crisis.
And you are in crisis. Your posts are not stable sounding at all. Pease reach out to a service, either 911 or the crisis service Ninjastar provided.
It’s not gibberish. It really does have meaning. I feel separated from my body and thoughts right now, like all my mind’s functions are severed and scattered. There are spirits all around me! Who is to say that I am schizophrenic? Were there every any tests with biological validity done? No. Just countless interviews from countless doctors who determined that my perception of reality, my ways of thinking, and my behavior did not fit in with the oppressive institutional CONSENSUS REALITY (Copyright by McDonald’s mind-ray arches). I am not schizophrenic. Who is to say that I CANNOT talk to spirits? WHO is to say that these spirits are not real? Who is to say my “symptoms” were not caused by SPIRITUAL CRISIS/sublime connection OR DEMONIC POSSESSION? Nobody can say that for sure.
I’m going to go back to doing Rorschach tests.