School Started and Everything is Great

I take classes online and they just opened this past Friday, but the official start day is today. This is my first session taking a full time load. In the past when I’ve gone to brick and mortar institutions I could never do a full time semester. I would always get stressed and either go in the hospital or withdraw. I think I can do it this time though. I can access my textbooks on my Kindle and spent yesterday setting up the app and figuring out how to highlight, bookmark, and write notes. Today I planned out this week’s assignments in my planner, each day writing what I need to accomplish. I finished all of my work and reading I had to do today and feel accomplished. It really seems doable. If I can keep up this pace I will graduate with a Bachelor of Science degree in IT next year. I am able to make monthly payments now towards what my loans don’t cover and will only be financially responsible for only one class next year when my Financial Aid runs out. I can continue to stay in school next year and study for my Master of Science degree in Software Engineering which makes me eligible for new loans since it is at the graduate level. Since I will still be in school my loans will be deferred and I can take my time looking for a computer programming job. I plan to study for my Master of Science degree while working as a computer programmer and once I graduate I will have experience and can apply to a new job as a Software Engineer. Social Security will give me 9 months to try working. I’m learning more and more each day on ways to live with this illness so I think by next year I will be ready to work and can finally get off of disability. This week I start Mental Health IOP and hope to learn how to prevent psychotic episodes, deal better with the negative symptoms, and work around the cognitive symptoms.
The 11th is Jason and my 6 month anniversary. I can’t believe 6 months has passed already. I fall in love with him more and more each day. He is more than my boyfriend. He is my partner and best friend.
It seems like every area of my life is going great. There’s just one small thing I can’t figure out. My daytime Seroquel dose sedates me. I figured out if I take it on an empty stomach it’s not as bad, but for me sedation causes anxiety and psychosis. Everyday I feel like I’m going to die and have the demon hanging around. Once the sedation wears off I’m fine and don’t have any symptoms. I tried to figure it out with the pharmacist but all she could recommend was taking both doses at night, which I can’t do, or drink caffeine, which gives me panic attacks.
I’ve chanted for everything else so now I guess I have something new to chant for. Maybe I’ll chant for my pdoc to have the wisdom to know what to do.
I did have to schedule my ECT more frequently with my recent psychotic episode. Right now I’m doing every two weeks. The anxiety surrounding it has gotten better with therapy. My therapist is really proud of the progress I have made.
Well I hope all of you are doing well. :sunny:

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I can’t focus to read all of this, but, congrats on school, and good luck!

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I am so glad that things are going well for you. Thank you for the good news. :smile:

Congratulations on getting back on track so soon.

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I do not read any long posts ever, my concentration is what it is, but congrats on everything good.

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Maybe try seroquel XR. This slow release version tends to sedate me less.

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that’s great subgirl. i’m so glad you’re doing better and hope things continue to improve for you. good luck xxx

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Glad to know you are doing better @SunGirl - wishing you well! :smiley:

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