She was concerned about my lack of social contact and isolation. Kept putting forward idea of groups and college . I said I am very wary of non mentally ill people ,and that I am very limited as to where I feel comfortable going. I don’t think she grasped how much both of those affect me.
For example saying she would get a support worker to go with me a few times to unfamiliar places and hinting that that would solve the problem.
I told her I had looked at drop ins but found nothing suitable. Said I would look online for groups for the mentally ill when she suggested that,but having done searches before I don’t hold out much hope.
Then she finished by pushing CBT and http://www.therapyforyou.co.uk/. Best that can be said for the site is it gives the impression of working wonders but I am skeptical of the whole “CBT is wonderful” mentality.
Think I need something much more comprehensive and deep re the triggers for the paranoia and social anxiety. CBT is the ■■■■■■■ love child of mainstream psychiatry and psychology though.
CBT just seems to push a ‘It’s all down to faulty thinking’ angle without much consideration of the effects of life experiences.
Never got to discuss the difficulties with social interaction and forming friendships(initiating and sustaining conversations,knowing what to say) that are long term problems additional to the social anxiety and paranoia.
Overall got the impression it was all quite superficial and pushy.
I don’t think she had done her homework on me as she thought I had only been on medication/having psychiatric care for a short while. I had to correct her on that .
A thread stemming from yesterday’s experience.
i thought cbt was rubbish at first…i turned up at the beginning because i had been given the disability…i had nothing else to do, i was suicidal, psychotic…it was try this or basicaly the clinical psychologist was going to book me into hospital.
i went, it was not unpleasant…i went again.
i am a year into cbt…my diagnoses was paranoid sz with ptsd, ocd, chronic depression and suicidal and chronis pychosis.
i have been doing this sz thing probably since 2 years old certainly since 7 or 9 years old.
now i am still sz…but my other symptoms are greatly diminshed…some have almost disappeared e.g…the depression, sadness, suicide.
i have not been touched by jesus…so for me the cbt works.
it is not easy, it is hard work, it is confronting, it is emotionaly draining…but worth it.
take care 
I usually get this impression from inexperienced younger workers. I wonder how old she is.
I am wary of anything that negates life experiences as much as CBT does. The whole idea that it wasn’t the emotional/physical/sexual abuse/trauma that had an effect but the way that your naughty brain processed it, really urinates me off.
Nothing wrong with abuse/trauma so long as your brain behaves itself.
I would say in her mid 40s. Obviously not a junior psychiatric nurse.
Felt as though she didn’t have a grasp on how much things affect me. In the right setting with people with similar issues/problems I can just about manage, but current mental health policy, including charities, has made that increasingly difficult.
It’s thanks to the damned trust and local authority that drop ins and a befriending service which gave someone like me social contact, that Rethink(mental health charity) provided , were shut down.
All because the local authority/trust were putting penny pinching first.
Had a google for “social groups” mentally ill Southend but it was a fruitless search apart from a mention of a local Mind service user group. I have sent an email asking for more information about it.
I started doing my own version of cbt on my own while in regular talk therapy. Now that I know a bit more about it, it strikes me a bit anal and overly complicated. I buy that I can control my thinking patterns and this can affect my perceptions my thinking and my mood. I’m a technical person so it seems as simple as troubleshooting yourself. Maybe troubleshooting doesn’t come naturally if you haven’t had experience.
I find that my own version of cbt makes me better at my job because I can solve problems other people can’t because they don’t question their perceptions assumptions or thought processes and/or can’t sort out what’s important and what’s not.
In reading this post and a lot of your others recently I get very frustrated. I can totally see your pov about wanting to find the perfect fitting group that is going to be the most comfortable for you. But as you describe things, that isn’t likely the case. It comes down to two options: stay as you are, isolated. Or, get out of your comfort zone and experience new things.Its the only way you’ll grow as a person, or do you want to remain stagnant?
Or, this just came to mind create your own group. For instance, with the help of a local peer advocacy group, another peer and I created a women’s group for people with mental illness because we wanted a group that didn’t have a therapist leading it. If you create it, they will come. It was actually pretty easy to set up. We had to define what we wanted the group to be, set rules/boundaries, find a meeting space, set a time/date, do outreach/marketing. The planning process took about 1 month to do. It was very easy to do.
I second @skims, perhaps you need to be outside the comfort zone. Your meds seem to be working well. Maybe talk to a pdoc about an antianxiety medication and then go for it!
I did attend a peer run group. It would have been great if it had been a roaring success but few people attended(3-4 including me). As previously mentioned one,the peer facilitator, would often launch into his delusions. Another was virtually monosyllabic/spoke less than a handful of sentences in an hour. Any fourth member was a sporadic attender though neither into his delusions or virtually uncommunicative.
If there was another such group I would go but there isn’t much enthusiasm for them at least from a male perspective.
As for organising and setting up a group not all of us have the confidence or skills to do so.
Contrary to your insinuations I am regularly looking for things that can help reduce my social isolation without causing undue stress.
It is pointless doing anything where possible gains will be offset by probable losses.
You get out what you put into it. I would have spoken with the facilitator or the advocacy group and told them what was going on and how that made you feel as a participant in the group, that that person was dominating the group and going on about their delusions. I bet that would have put the kibosh on him.
We only have 3-4 women in our group, one says very little you have to draw her into conversation. What losses could you have by being uncomfortable for an hour or two? Like I said we had help putting the women’s group together, there is no way I could have done it myself.
It gets easier over time as you get to know people in the different groups. And you say that you only want a group with people with MI, but from what you said they have to be like minded. As in they have to participate and show up regularly. Well, good luck finding that! Even with normal people, people have lives outside of the group. It’s been 5 months since our women’s group started and participation has petered off, I think with winter here the group is done. I’ve made some friends that I’ll keep in touch with.
I also want to say that I am sorry for putting you on the defensive. I am just frustrated for you, that you are not finding what you are looking for, and want to help. I’m trying to give you ideas and encourage you, not discourage you. I hope I don’t do that.
I had agreed for a support worker to look into http://www.richmondfellowship.org.uk/services/rf-southend-southend-community-links .
It’s time limited which is a problem as I don’t see recovery as being on the cards.
If I am suitable it’s a stop gap for up to 2 years.
Finding anything long term for those with chronic problems, who aren’t likely to fit the recovery agenda, is hard.
When you’re fighting your own demons other persons’ advice can seem wide of the mark. I’m considering CBT myself. I think a part of myself wants to be sick.
I don’t want to be sick but I don’t discount uncertainty about what being well would entail.
Found out Richmond fellowship was founded in 1959 by a Dutch theology student and this slim book from 1986 hints at religious underpinnings. As I am best described as an agnostic atheist the possibility of religious propaganda doesn’t sit well with me. Willing to give it a try but any sniff of religion being preached and it’ll be "f&!* off you twunts "