Relapse (in more ways than one)

I’ve been smoking weed again. I had some mad withdrawals and was an emotional wreck. Had a fight with a friend and gave in. I’m disappointed because here I am, stuck where I was again, but I haven’t just been sitting still.

I applied to a few jobs for housekeeping and stocking. It’s not a career like I wanted, but it’s something. Anyway, I’m feeling pretty down and have also had a relapse in paranoid symptoms (which I recognize is probably related to the weed). I guess I’m looking to hear that it’s going to be okay, and any advice. I’ll try to keep an open mind.

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I drank some Delta 9 sparkling waters the last two weeks. I don’t like how it feels so I’m not doing it again.

If you have schizophrenia or a psychotic disorder then it’s probably best to avoid marijuana. I got paranoid on Delta 9 every day I had some even though it’s legal here and they sell it at three or four different places in town.

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I’m glad you shared. And I’m glad you are here. I got sober from mj recently and the past few days have been tough sledding. I drag myself to MA meetings and always think about principles as I’m going through it.

I’d recommend 12-step meetings; without them I’d be using no doubt. I have a sponsor and completed the stepwork.

Are there any MA meetings in your area? You can check https://marijuana-anonymous.org/

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Marijuana is going to keep wrecking your life. I don’t know if you smoked it before you got ill, but if you did, it was probably fun. You have to face the reality that it will never be fun again. You can’t handle weed now and you will never be able to. You are going to get the same reaction that you just did every time you smoke it. When it comes to weed, nothing is going to change, it will always make you paranoid and it will probably make you psychotic too.

On the plus side, it’s good that you’re seeking employment, working is a good way to take your mind off your problems.
I’m a janitor; housekeeping and stocking doesn’t seem like bad work to me. Department stores often have openings for a stock person. Places like Kohl’s, Target, Sears (if they’re still around).

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I appreciate the resources. I’ll take a look.

I never smoked until I was well into adulthood and already diagnosed for many years. I know it’s detracting from my life. I’m slowly building coping skills through therapy, but it’s undermined by my running back to something that’s keeping me sick. I’ve always struggled with addiction to something. It’s like the constant in my life, aside from paranoia.

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Sorry to hear you’re feeling down @catchme

The best way to quit marijuana is to taper. Otherwise you’ll just keep falling back into the habit.

Also, it would help to list the reasons why you smoke. This can ultimately let you decide if you want to quit for good.

Marijuana is not for everyone. Especially those with mental illness.

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Thank you for the reply! My partner also insists tapering is the way to go. Perhaps I’ll go that route.

Oh, and I will take your advice on listing reasons why I smoke.

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Another invaluable resource: Life with Hope, the book that accompanies 12-step

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im back on weed again, vaping oil. It will only ruin your health.

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Holy crap, thanks mate!

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Cheers to our (deteriorating) health? :beers:

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You seem to know it as much as others do, Cannabis won’t help you get to your goals. It’s a distraction at best and life wrecking at worst.

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thats happened to me. the weed makes things worse. im trying to stay away from it now. and i feel good. havent had it in maybe a month. i think u will feel better if u avoid it.

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It’s not good for the psyche. It was illegal for a reason. The only reason it became legal some places(except netherlands) is because the government doesen’t have resources to enforce the law anymore. So now all the responsibility is on the people to find out for themselves.