From my own research I am certain I have traits of Aspergers, but probably fit a similar disorder,NVLD, better.
Over the years,on several occasions, I have heard the A word used by psychiatric staff, but there has never been any move to arrange for a formal assessment.

The last time the A word was raised I was told “Not that there was anything much we can do”. Perhaps this relates to my age(59) or perhaps it’s because they are more focussed on what they see as primary psychiatric symptoms. I do wonder whether a more holistic approach to psychiatry would have looked beyond those so called primary symptoms.

My biggest problem is social interaction difficulties. These stretch back as far as I can remember. The rules of social engagement seem like a foreign language to me.
I have only had one serious adult friend. It was a woman nearly 22 years older than me that I met in psych hospital.
We were together for 22 years before she died.

Since then I haven’t come near to another friendship. With the closing of local mental health drop ins I spent 98-99% of my time on my own. The other 1-2% is periodic visits from family.

As well as the Aspergic traits/possible NVLD I would say that I also may have dyspraxia , what I have heard referred to as directional/geographical/spatial dyslexia and aphantasia(though that is not considered by many with it as having a disabling effect).

With this although reckoned to be of above average/high intelligence I do have some cognitive difficulties for which the term “learning difficulties” could probably be used. I score very well on verbal tests but poorly on (visuo) spatial tests/tests of diagrammatic reasoning. I also have difficulties with executive functioning(NB organising and planning)
and slow processing speed.

I come from a generation where unless you were seen as being autistic in childhood your problems in that area were not picked up on. This was long before Aspergers came into existence as a diagnosis.

This late in life I don’t see an official diagnosis of those things, whatever you may call them,leading to a massive improvement in my life . I think too much water has gone under the bridge for that.
However it would be good to get some official recognition of those things if only to provide a better picture of the difficulties I face and give a better,more accurate assessment of me as a person.

If the U.K. is anything like America, funding to help people on the autistic spectrum drops significantly after age 21. The reason for that is that some studies show the greatest improvements can be seen before age 21. Interventions are more effective on children. So it might not be that your doctor doesn’t want to help you. You just might not qualify for anything since you don’t have behavioral challenges. Most of the adult funding goes to the kids who can cause serious damage to themselves or others.

Or maybe it’s not like that over there at all. America is messed up.

You are probably right,unfortunately. I don’t know about America, but the system here is underfunded and basically crap. It fails both those with acute or chronic problems.