So, my husband and son and I went to my in-laws for bbq last evening. They’re really good, kind people. My brother-in-law has a new girlfriend, though, whom I admittedly am having a hard time with. She’s a fitness instructor with extremely large fake breasts, and she dresses like she’s on the set for a porn flick…there, I said it. Maybe she senses my discomfort, I don’t know, but last evening we were all talking, and she started laughing after my brother-in-law told her that I work at a high school. It was really awkward. She couldn’t control her laughing, and I believe she was laughing at me. My brother-in-law looked at me and joked that she must be drunk. I walked away. I was so angry. It’s already difficult for me to be in social situations, but my husband’s family is usually safe. I don’t want to go to anything else with her there now. We’re supposed to go to a park with them today, but I’m not going because she’ll be there.
I guess your brother-in-law is rich and attracted by that kind women.
Jerks are everywhere. It sucks but you will keep meeting them and they will do mean things to you. Try not to let them get to you. After all, they’re the ones who have a problem. Those jerks are just expressing their flawed character when they are mean to others. You are a better than that. Hope this helps.
He’s a good guy, but he does like flashy things (cars and women). That’s his choice and I can respect that, but I don’t understand his girlfriend. I don’t gain power by putting other people down. I don’t derive pleasure from making other people uncomfortable. I would never be so disrespectful as to laugh and not explain myself. I’m supposed to be the one who doesn’t get social cues. She gets them and just doesn’t care. I don’t get that.
Thank you, @anon9798425. I’ve dealt with it my whole life (always the odd one out), but I’ll never understand it. Thanks for your encouragement. 
Why is working at a high school funny? She sounds like a real inconsiderate person.
I don’t like going to my brothers house because of my sister in law.
She is a self centered, selfish,money grubbing gold digger.
I used to feel sorry for my brother, but he puts up with her crap and defends her selfish actions.
I have tried to get along with her in the past, now I just avoid her.
I often meet confident people in my personal life (brother-in laws, friends of my sisters, people at their parties or get togethers etc.) who I feel intimidated by because of their position in life or they have a sharp tongue or are better looking than me and I know they could destroy me or make me look bad on a whim of theirs.
Some of them condescend to me and treat me bad and I don’t really even realize it or I realize it but I rationalize it as “Hey, they’re not aggressively attacking me so maybe they’re good people”. But I feel in a lower position than them and feel bad.
After they leave my life (for whatever reason) it takes me literally years sometimes to realize that some of these people were as*holes. And usually I only find this out when my family or someone else points it out to me. And I regret my time spent with them kowtowing to them and treating them like they were nice.I guess this doesn’t help you but maybe it does in a roundabout way.
It’s hard because it’s family. If this girlfriend lasts for years/marries my brother-in-law, I’m going to have to find a way to deal with her. I didn’t like his now ex-wife that much, but this one’s worse. I’m sorry you have an issue too. Part of my resentment is, because of sz, having to question myself. I have to check my own thoughts and make sure I’m not feeling attacked/disrespected, etc., unnecessarily. I’m pretty sure I’m right on this one…
You’re a nice person, and I’m a nice person. It’s good to assume other people are nice too, but I don’t have that. I think most people are mean, for whatever reason. I have to check myself to make sure I’m not over-reacting (kind of opposite of you). There’s no doubt this time that this girl’s a b****, though. And, yes, I’ve gained weight and would feel less upset if I was still really fit, because I would feel more equal to her in that way. I understand what you mean about that. But if she was a nice person that wouldn’t be an issue.
How bizarre. I don’t get what the laughter was about - either it reminded her of something hilarious that didn’t have much relation to the immediate conversation, or she’s utterly out of sync.
I can’t understand anyone laughing at your career - it’s a necessary, even noble one. I’d try to give her a second chance from a distance; if she really is so shallow/freaking weird, it will become apparent. I’m keeping my fingers crossed it was just an unfortunate outburst on her part.
Like other posters have said, I fail to see what’s remotely funny about you working at a high school.
The voice of reason Thank you 
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Yes, I agree with Orange, Rubot and Nomad. I don’t know if you are a teacher, an office worker or a counselor or what your position is at the high school but working at a school is a respectable position which stands on its own and doesn’t need defending. Besides, just in case she was laughing at you, what the hell does she do for a living that is so much better than you? But yeah, Rhubot is right. I wouldn’t judge her on just one action.
She’s a fitness instructor…
I’m a special education assistant.
Thanks, @77nick77.
Yeah I tend to get negative feedback about my lack of affect from my meds. I’m hoping that the twitching in my face because of TD doesn’t start becoming more noticeable. But now I’m just trying to master the art of not giving a ■■■■ about what people think of me. I just try to refrain from telling these people to ■■■■ off and just instead ignore the negativity. Sometimes I just let the negative comments “flow over my head” instead of into my ears if that makes sense.
That’s what we have to do…just let it go. You’re right, @MaxB. I’m awkward and kind of a dork. Actually, oddly enough, the effort that goes into my smiling and being friendly to people totally backfires at times like that. For all I know, I had a weird expression on my face at that moment. I’m tired of trying. I’m tired. I appreciate you sharing your struggle. I do think you’re on the right track.
Your job is as noble as hers, probably more so. Helping kids, (especially special needs kids) is one of the most respectable things you can do. I appreciate that you’re tired. I’m tired too.
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