Sorry about the overwhelming negativity in my posts lately. I’m living in fear every day.
I can’t associate with my peers anymore.
When I see them, I feel that they’re going to hit or hurt me. They just look so scary. I am somehow brought back to the time of my child abuse and witnessing my peers bullying me. I just feel so scared.
I feel like they will be cunning and scary as the children of my elementary school. Adults in charge are even more scary. What if they will hit me like my teachers did back then?
Hi @anon10648258 Im sorry youre feeling this way. Does self reassurance work? Like reminding yourself that people are generally nice and good and arent all evil and hurtful?
Living in fear is no way to live I hope you can pull through this and see the world through a nicer lens
I’m just so scared of going out to social gatherings. So scared.
I hate people. People can hurt me anytime. They may have kind faces…but the teachers who hurt me did too. They hated me
Trauma is a terrible time. Therapy has helped me quite a bit.
I found the most helpful thing for me was systematic desensitization. Where basically you expose yourself slowly to triggers and it basically trains your brain to not see certain triggers as a threat.
Like I was scared of therapists/doctors for a long ass time but by going to therapy more and more I learned how to be less scared.
And I suggest working with a therapist to overcome your fear.
I’ve been there. I have battled PTSD since I was 17 so 7 years now. I am a hardcore advocate of treatment. If you really dig in in therapy and do self work as well you can make HUGE progress. And the thing with PTSD treatment is it’s super super hard and you may feel like it’s not beneficial because it will set you off very very badly at first and you’ll feel set back by a mile. But you will notice over time that you are set back less and less and things that triggered you really bad now only trigger you a little and then sometimes they don’t trigger you all. You’ll find you go from thinking about your trauma constantly to only sometimes and then suddenly realize you’ve gone months barely thinking about it and feel like you dont even have PTSD. That’s the difference good treatment can make.
However even if you have the best treatment PTSD is still a lifelong disorder and I still get my flare ups from time to time. But I know when they will happen and what causes them so I am prepared, and I know that the flare up will pass, that’s the best thing you can do is remind yourself the flare up will pass. I also used to be in that state where I was in terrible fear every day and now I am fine. Dive into treatment and work hard and you will see great rewards!! Recovery is very possible!!