I have. I would beat the shite out of my younger siblings if I felt they’d wronged me.
Can you define violent?
Is kicking a nurse when they overwhelm you with 6 persons in the public space to undress you and forcefully drug you, when you were quietly praying in the garden, violence?
Is saying horrible things to someone (who does the same to you) violence?
I think i was verbally “violent” in a few occasions, and it was mutual. I dont think i was ever physically violent, except in the above example - they found me violent, but i found them violent and me acting from self-defense.
using or involving physical force intended to hurt, damage
Then i dont think so. In the above example i was defending myself. For the rest i never used physical force i think.
I think a lot of “schizophrenic violence” is actually intended as self-defense. Even if it is based on a complete misjudgement.
As far as I know, I’ve been violent towards myself by multiple suicide attempts during psychosis. But never to another person.
I smashed a very very solid coffee cup in half on my dope dealer’s head
he got severe concussion but no police or hospital - could be ABH or GBH or assault
that was because i was paranoid of him and thought he was laughing at me
15 years later i punched a nurse 2 x in the face
they said that her tooth was wobbly
that was because i thought she was asking me to hit her
similar situation with a gay girl - but that was sexual violence not pure violence
i thought she wanted me to get in bed with her
and another i was told by voices to head butt someone but i thought that i was far too feminine to do that so i just went to kick him
there were staff in the way anyway
Only violent to myself cutting myself, never to others - unless you count me throwing a cushion and book at my husband and screaming at him during an argument
No. And this is my biggest contention with society. Most of us don’t succumb to violence despite what the movies suggest. If more people read books perhaps us with Sz wouldn’t be so shunned. On a personal note, when I slipped into psychosis and lost touch with reality, I did a ton of emailing to people. It was embarrassing ultimately but my point is I always pick up the pen, not the sword. Always.
A tidbit from Wikipedia is that those with sz are more likely to have violence done to them than the other way around. I wish we could flesh this out a little more with people, but saying it doesn’t seem to be good enough somehow. Good topic.
Never violent against others, only towards myself
Er, when I was 19 and freshly diagnosed I was sitting in the backyard of a group home eating a bowl of cereal alone and one of the other residents was above me on a stair landing and he deliberately spit near me. Without thinking, I threw my bowl of cereal at him as hard as I could and it missed his face by inches but he had milk and cereal on his face and his shirt. We faced off looking at each other but my anger just faded away and I thought how pointless the whole thing was. I never had any prior beef with him and before this we got along fine.
In 38 year’s of paranoid schizophrenia that was my only violence, and to tell the truth I don’t even know if that incident qualifies as violence. Oh yeah, before that happened, there was this guy who kept bugging me whenever he got the chance so one day I grabbed him by the throat and banged his head against a wall and choked him, it was nothing serious though. To be honest, through the years I’ve met many people who I had the urge to punch them in the nose but I always restrained myself.
But yeah, those incidents were when I was 19 years old and I’m 58 now. But yeah, I grew up playing sports like football and a lot of my jobs were physical jobs and I was fairly strong when I was younger but I have had very few serious confrontations. It’s happened though.
if self defense is violent then I am prone to violence. I love myself most of all.
Only in self defense so no. No-one got hurt that did not have it coming to them.
I used to be “violent” but it was either for self defense or I would just try to scare people. I never tried to hurt anyone… An alter of mine was a little scarier though but they only showed up for self defense.
I’ve never been a violent schizophrenic in my life.
I was beaten a lot, though.
The most violent I’ve ever been was throwing apples at people from a balcony. Otherwise no I wasn’t violent at all. I did get beaten a lot when I was psychotic, and did try to kill myself so I could leave the simulation, though. I’m thankful for my meds.
I used to carry a knife with me, and I would reach for it anytime a person came near. I think if someone surprised me, I might have hurt them. SO glad I don’t have knives or that driving need anymore!
There were many times I lost my temper over something the voices said. But it was the voices that received the results with the exception of a few times where I reached the borderline of having a public display of anger. I don’t want to describe them.
I’ve only been violent to walls, doors, and a couple plates