Their words cut so deep sometimes. Both my parents just started yelling at me for no reason. I went over to their house to get some food (i live next door) And my mom went off on me saying Im so worthless Im a sloth I dont do anything when they need me to. All I care about is money and thats the basis of our relationship. I cant take care of myself, Im lazy Im stupid and I cant get my life together.
All this started when The guy came over to gice an estimate on the sprinkler leak… I offered to fix it for them last week but she doesnt trust me to do handyman stuf around the house because I take a while to do it and never work exactly at the times she wants me too. But I said to her cuz the guy was trying to gouge them for money that I would do most of the digging and work. He said he was going to come back on saturday to fix it after I got all the leg work out of the way. I thought all was fine and dandy, I was planning on working on it all day friday. Then my dad came and knocked on my door at about 630pm saying he wantewd me to start on it. So I did and then it got too dark and I had to stop. Then my mom said another guy is supposed to come tomorrow to work on it and she cant depend on my because im too crazy and I never listen to whats going on. I had no idea they didnt tell me they were hiring two different guys. Then she said she was sick of me, im worthlessall i do is drink and sleep and to get out of her house. Mind you i just quit my job in the emergency room cuz they forced me too cuz they said I was going to be a vector. And I wake up at 3am to work in the stock market so I sleep most of the afternoon and stay up late cuz I have trouble sleeping. Okay rant over, I think Im going to drink now.
Yeah parents… my mother was constantly shouting at me when i started chainsmoking after my first hospitalization. She also forced me to do job centre job in a park. She really hated me smoking and whenever I was going for a smoke she said “again?” And she tried to guilt shame me by sweet talking but it often turned out into shouting
Parents can be hurtful but alot of the time they try to mean well. Mine get on me about drinking and needing to exercise more which is very annoying.
Schizophrenia has damaged my view on living and I drink to cope. I would love to be more normal if it was possible.
My parents were pretty horrible when I got sick.
My dad was the worse of the two.
Try to take what they say with a grain of salt.
Don’t know what else to say, except maybe you should move to get away from them.
I heard this a lot when I was sick. It doesn’t help with recovery. It is hard to take big steps forward when nobody around you celebrates your smaller victories.
I’m sorry that your parents are being unreasonable. I used to get mad arguments with my parents, until I moved out and lived on my own.
My mother could scream at me for 20 minutes plus and would use bogus excuses. She did this starting from age 5.
Now she’s needy and has threatened to go to my guardian because I didn’t talk to her for 20 hours. This was a week ago. Yelling at your kids for 20+ minutes when they haven’t done anything is abuse.
When I was 8-10 years old, after a fight with my brother she said I hated him because he has a dad. He wasn’t even hurt. 5 minutes later he acted normal.
I don’t have a dad because of her and his piss poor decision making. To throw it in my face is disgusting, and sometimes I think she’s a disgusting person.
Well an update on my parents, my mom is still pissed at me and started making passive agressive comments about how successful I was when I was working on the ambulance and began to elude that I should get back into having discipline. She then began to give me flack about my decision to leave medical school. (well I I moved to another country for school for a few years almost finished but couldnt because the school lost the loan program for the american students when the banks reconsolidated; and with loans now due I had to consider other alternatives like physician assistant school, but since my college credits’expired’ in the eyes of the admissions departments because its been more than 7 years since I got my degree, I had to go back to college and retake my basic sciences.) So I’ve been doing that the past year and a half. Moved to seattle because it was a quarter system, and right after I established myself my parents said to move home because my dad is well advanced in his years and they wanted me to help out more. So I moved back to hawaii, living at my parents mother in law studio, now 34, with more debt than income. My parents then suggest to me to invest my loan payments in the stock market, I did made about 20k in 4 months, then for the past few months have been building it up in my mind to return to medical school and finish. Because now I have almost enough money. They really convinced me to finish what I started rather than take the pa route. So I got accepted into a different school in the carribbean and am scheduled to start from home in a week because of quarentine. The messed up part is, I went to discuss w my dad the pending documents to cosign on my loan and my mom overheard our conversation and jumped in yelling saying their not going to cosign on my loan no matter what. So I asked about how I could finish and they she said this is a pipe dream I need to grow up and forget about it! Now I spent months preparing myself for it and now she turned the tides on me. And the worse part is the money I made from selling my car in the picture went to paying for her new deck for the house for my dad. Then she has the audacity to complain about money needed to finish the landscaping and other handman work. Since they like to control me with money, I thought she would want me to solve the problem. So I proposed, instead of #k to this guy and $2k to the other handyman, why not let me do the work and take that money and invest it in our family and my education. She entertained the idea, and thats where I am today. With this money I can pay for one semester I only have two more to go so I might not need the loan for the next semester. I just dont know what Ill do after that. I hope I can make more money in the stock market, but last two weeks Ive been losing on my shorts. Im just so stressed about everything and havent been sleeping well. Mayby their right, I dont deserve to become a doctor and I am all that they say I am. Which is fine because mayby I am, but I just feel like there is so much for to strive for in life. ■■■■ this disease and societies beliefs about where we are meant to fit in. It shouldnt be that way
@firemonkey Hey firemonkey, your a very bright guy, whats your frank opinion on this?
This term springs to mind when reading all that . I did quite a bit better after not living with my parents .
Ah the famous dance between the limbic system and the frontal cortex; excellent postulation. Thank you for your help with this debacle
Heres an update on the sprinkler situation. I got the sprinkler leak fixed today. It doesn’t look like much but talk about a thorn in your side. I didn’t know the initial problem, momma just told me to rip out the ferns and expose the pipe. So I did, and I did all by hand because it was too narrow to fit a shovel in there, I had to use a gardening shovel. Then when I got that done I tested the line, turns out the line had no leaks, she was just tired of the old plants. Smh. But there was indeed a leak coming off the half inch pipe from the main line at the top of the stairs. And to make matters were there turned out to be 4 different lines running between the wall and the steps. You cant see it in the picture because the 6 inch waste/drainage pipe is obscuring the view, but underneath coming off the T joint is a L joint with a black PVC hose traversing down under the stairs. Its an old an jaded hose that they don’t make anymore. They’ve since been replaced with reinforced pvc in different dimensions. I went down to Lowes to find some parts, but they didn’t have the parts I needed, I tried three different combinations and even made friends with a plumber who was a customer, we still couldn’t get the combination right. But before I went to Home depot I stopped by my friends place to drop off food to his dad who is a retired maintanence worker and schizoaffective. I was explaining how the leak was so old and the water pressure so high, that Iit washed all the dirt and rocks up from under the stairs and the stairs were beginning to show cracks because of the gap it made in the foundation. He had a solution for me and said because theres no double male to bridge that size just use warm water to loosen the old pipe and insert the new hard plastic into it, and now Im Everhopeful because it worked followed by some PVC glue and use of a couple adjustable clamps. Only ■■■■■ was, I had to do the repair, in the mud, blindly, and through feel with no room to use any tools because of the 6 inch waste pipe and the other two old lines and the space was uninviting. But now the street sprinklers don’t need to be watered by hand anymore, so Im pretty happy about that. Next step is for the dirt to go back to its home in the space between. Once that happens I can fill the lines with rock and a layer of polished stone. It should look nice when its all done. My mom even seemed happy I saved her $743. She was actually nice to me today and even made me dinner
My parents do this but I’m aware that I’m a piece of crap. I’m just not worth living.
What did you do to deserve that feeling?
It’s because I’m physically ill all the time I waste my parents’ money. I’ve been stuck at home for three years because I’m too fatigued to do anything right now.
I know that they are frustrated with me and they hate that I’m a schizophrenic. I know that they’re super ashamed by it and I know that they want me to disappear.
I know that’s not how it is for everyone but it seems like that’s how it is in my family.
you cant stop the waves but you can choose the ones you ride 
I just wish that I wasn’t alive. It would be so much easier on my family if I just disappeared. So much better if their only child was my brother.
I though in a nother thread you just posted that you work and go to school?
What are you studying and filing your mind with?
That’s right- I was accepted to University of Victoria but unfortunately COVID-19 cancelled that. I also work as a freelance translator. I’m studying sociology.