Out of the blue... glitch

DX'd - Other
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These are the days I really hate… these days where…

I went to bed at a good time
I got enough sleep
I took my meds
I had a healthy dinner last night and breakfast this morning…

and yet… I woke up fighting paranoia and some sneaky brained thinking. I was sure someone was peeking in our windows… i was sure my sis moved out of the apartment in my sleep… was sure my coffee had been tampered with… I was thinking the garbage man is stalking us.

(No, there is no one out side… my sis is still here and just getting ready for work, my coffee is fine… though a little weak today… the garbage man drove on and away.)

Having a hard time concentrating and I just don’t have my normal humor in me. I’m feeling flat and not as chatty today. I’m also feeling slow. I don’t want to go back to bed… I’m going to go for a gentle swim and hope that snaps me out of it. I’ll hop off sooner then later and ask my sis to drive.

I’m feeling a bit to scattered to be behind the wheel.

I hate it when I do everything right and it doesn’t feel like it’s working. I KNOW it’s working…

without meds… I’d be loosing it big time… not just fighting off a bit of irritated ennui.

The more I sit and stew on this… the worst it going to get. So I better step away, refocus my energy and get ready for the pool.

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I occasionally get those feelings too, and in the past have had some things like this actually happen.

Sis moving out while you slept would be the worst one… I had something like that happen before and it was devestating…

Something is usually peeking in the windows, insects and moths mainly…occasionally a cat…
I found a moth in my coffee a couple times… :frowning:
In my younger days around certain people I never let my drink leave my sight as some ‘friends’ had been known to put drugs in peoples drinks.

The garbage man is definitely stalking the people on their route. they WANT your garbage… Some garbage men are known to go through peoples trash… A friend of mine scored a nice stereo and speakers working on a garbage route… but others look for stuff like bank statements so they can do identity theft so must always beware what you throw in the trash and destroy all identifying papers…that part isnt paranoia, even the banks will say to do that…

the garbage man isnt out to get you though…just out to get your trash…

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Yeah I am having a day like that today J. No paranoia so far but my concentration level is very low.

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Not all days are same J. Maybe you’ll feel better after some time.

Good thing is that you have accepted that these feelings are not true all the time. Specially when they appear one after another. It must be very hard.

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I hope you snap out of it Surprised. Yeah, taking your mind off it with a swim sounds like a good idea. And treat yourself to a good breakfast too.

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I’m sorry you are feeling unstable this morning. Maybe report that to your next pdoc visit? The right med balance should straighten all that crap out? You are an awesome person!

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I will have better days than others - everyday is a different experience for me depending on my symptoms and which ones decide to show up - today I feel a bit revved up and on the edge of some anxiety - ask me in about 5 minutes and things could have changed for me

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I hope things level out for you. A swim which can be like mindfulness meditation, should help some. :swimmer:

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sorry ur having a bad morning hunni. just try and swim it out…literally. maybe u could head out on ur board and spend some time in the calming ocean this weekend? time to collect ur thoughts and calm ur fears. maybe a swim will b enough to do that. i hope u feel better soon as u r doing soooo well. i think ur awesome for managing to hold down a job. that’s a big responsibility and u do it and do it well. don’t b so hard on urself. even normies have bad days. just write this morning off as one of those things. we all have days like this. remember, u haven’t failed at anything uv set ur mind on. u r a valuable member of this site, ur community, ur family and ur workplace. to me that is success at every level. just write this off as one of those days. it happens. dust urself off, pick urself up and tell urself that tomorrow will b better than today. all my love, ur friend, jayne xxx

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I’ve learned to just say my psychologist’s version of the serenity prayer; “F**k it!” He seriously told me to do that and called it that. I just take a bad day and wake up normal again soon enough.

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Every day my life is over. But every day I usually forget about it and just do SOMETHING. Anything. Like a phone call or a soda at Walgreen’s or clean something. And my life continues! I have to learn to trust myself more. I do know some crap and confidence is right around the corner. I figure if people are using me I must have something worth knowing or know something they don’t. I’m learning a lot about people just by doing my own thing. People are mighty tricky when it comes to survival! Maybe I’m just seeing it wrong. I see people as a bunch of Mortimer’s! Aggressive, a little self-centered, dangerous. No offense.But a lot of them are bluffing. Or maybe it’s just me. My take on life. With a bunch of caffeine in me.

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i am blank girl today also usually happens when i don’t sleep enough.

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Yeah, I need some sleep too. At least I’m not ranting too much.

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’ muggles ’ wake up and feel like rubbish too…don’t be to hard on yourself.
the positive thing is you can apply logic to it.
take care

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Most people are not on my level of lifting weights, by that I mean have never and will never do the things I have done in gyms, do not know hand to hand combat, are not paranoid schizophrenics, and are not ENTJ’s, ruthless commander types. My personality is very rare and very prominent, people like me stand out in school and the workplace as being intuitive and leading directly, telling people how things are and what’s gonna happen.

I am a pretty unique person, and some things lined up in a peculiar way to make me end up like this. Most people are not aggressive as I am, less egotistical, and certainly not dangerous. You always mention

something along those lines, and that sounds like its just paranoia if you ask me. Not blaming you for being paranoid, just informing you and hopefully enlightening you.

Not everyone has my personality type and by all means, even fewer have my background (military brat). I have met some ENTJ’s and INTJ’s in my time. It can be a little awkward or competitive when two people think they should be leading.

Also, I share my thoughts and my past on here, which is not what you would see if you came across me in public. I am actually pretty friendly to strangers as long as they arent asking me for money or something in the bad parts of town- I mean I am friendly to cashiers, hold the door for people behind me, listen to sales pitches even if I dont give a ■■■■, I just take their card and act mildly interested, ect.

But if it’s a class discussion and you pitch a flawed argument, I will say something about it, if there is a group assignment, I am always the leader. I am not rude about it, I just want things done right the first time they are done. A professor said that about people with the creative type on the DISC- they want things done right, and they want it done now.

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Thanks, that helps. I spend a little too much time alone and I get a skewed point of view of people. I was out all day today though.