No one wants me

Absolutely no one.
Not even a single place.
None.
I just hate everything about myself.
I hate that I have this illness.
I hate myself.
I just don’t think I’m fit for this world? Like no one wants me because I have this illness.
Everyone in my country wants me dead. Why on earth do I have to live like this?
I hate hate hate myself.
I am a shame and disgrace.
Absolutely no one wants me

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We’ve all been there

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WE want you :slight_smile:
You shouldn’t stigmatize yourself. Even though your country has a negative view of people with mental illnesses, I’m sure there are plenty of people who don’t think that way.

There are lots of people who care about you and want to see you thrive.

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I just woke up after series of nightmares. The stigma is even bothering me at night.
I’m just so scared, guys. So scared.
I don’t want to sleep, I don’t want to think, and I don’t want to live.
Everything I think about is the stigma, the media, the comments on the internet… just…every day is horror. Every day is agony.
I want to sleep more but I’m afraid that I will have more nightmares. I am just so scared of myself and this society.
I beg God to take my life away.

@ninjastar. We need crisis intervention info

We’re all just puppies. Everybody loves puppies. That’s what I think to myself when I worry about stuff like that. You shouldn’t beat yourself up for feeling bad or for the stigma, none of that’s your fault. Lots of people love you I’m sure, and if they don’t it’s just because they don’t know you.

I’m sorry about the nightmares, I’m having them too. Try not to internalize the stigma, it’s all untrue. Nobody should be unloved because of something that is beyond their control, that’s just common sense, at least among sensible people.

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Hey plorans, Im so sorry you live in an environment where there is so much shame regarding this illness.

Is there anyone close to you who truly understands and is compassionate towards your situation with your illness? If so please reach out to them and let them know youre struggling hard.

In the meantime have you ever heard of the serenity prayer? It really is insightful, I recite it to myself over and over in times of pain and crisis, maybe it can help you too:

“God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.”

Just remember, you did not come to sz alone, there were other factors, other people. You do not deserve all the blame.

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I feel this way too. I’m so alone. People don’t like me because of my schizophrenia. Sometimes I don’t know if I will be able to live the rest of my life with this illness, with this loneliness.

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I totally agree with this. You belong here, my friend.

@pretzel I agree- a lot of my sz symptoms refer to my child abuse.

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If you are feeling suicidal, please tell someone — a friend or family member, a teacher, a doctor or therapist or call 911 (if you’re in the U.S.) or the Emergency Medical Services phone number in your country.

You can also call a suicide prevention hotline—these are available in the U.S. and in many other countries.

International suicide hotlines:

http://www.suicide.org/international-suicide-hotlines.html

http://www.suicidestop.com/suicide_prevention_chat_online.html

Suicide hotlines in the U.S.:

https://afsp.org/find-support/

https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org

This sounds horrific
Hang on though I have been suffering like that and it’s the worst thing in the world but you can get through it there will be light at end of the tunnel
Can you speak to your medical team

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