I wake, i make coffee, i go out to veranda,i smoke, if i go inside i nap then repeat. Everything else feels like to much effort i hardly even change my clothes once every two weeks i have appointment this is when i bathe brush teeth wash hair, mum does everything i need done like shopping, going the bank, washing dishes, cleaning.
I think about death but suicide seems too hard.
I feel like i can not continue but even throwing myself in front of the bus that comes past the front door seems too hard but if i found myself on the road i would not step out its way. I have love ones i do not want to hurt like that. I smile tell them i had a good day and that i am fine. I feel 100 im 26, i told my gp ive been depressed but did not explain further same with the case co ordinater from the mental health team i see my psychiatrist Thursday but i dont know how to tell him i feel lower than i have ever felt.
I have no voices no paranoia and no delusions for the first time in 5 years why cant i just be happy? Do u have advice?
Tell them your not functioning. That is important. Lack of function is a sign of things like depression and negatives. What meds are you on? I’m hearing that your struggling and you need some help. You need to make this available but seeing shrink should be good.
Your not living normally and you’ve ideation! It’s not normal and you need some help!
First of all 26 is really young so time is on your side
Have you tried antidepressants they can really help
Is there a nurse or support worker you can get help from
I had a support worker years ago and she take me out once a week for coffee she was very positive
Im on an anti depressant Escitalopram it was originally prescribed for social anxiety my case cordinator i talk to often but i am in the process of getting ndis and this may give me 4 hours with a support person a week but could be a couple of months before it is finalized.
Not sure on those meds. Abilify didn’t work well for me but changing antidepressant could help somewhat. Hard to know and I’m just an internet hack. I don’t prescribe nor mean too!
If you’ve been on it for 6 weeks or so and no help then talk to your doc and try something else. That is usually a good period to get some response. Not sure of your med system. Over here in Australia most meds cost the same. If your not working you get a good discount still. You may not be in such a system and paying high dollar for your meds.
Get your meds right and your not a burden. No one is.
Seriously. I cost my parents heaps but I pay that back now I can because I’m stable on meds.
Take stock! Get your meds right and move from there. Not being able to function is a serious sign your meds aren’t working right. Talk to your treatment team and ask for results. It’s a tough cop but you can do this!
You sound like you have depression but dont worry because its treatable. Keep working with your doctor to address the condition, and there are other things you can do as well. Quitting cigarettes can do wonders for improving mood because its a “depressant” drug.
Also the energy you get from it can lead to other things like physical activity.
How are you doing now? Do you have some things you can turn to in your life when youre sad like singing, a friend, a bath etc? Maybe you can make a list of stuff you can fall back on when youre not feeling so great
Honestly im feeling better had a cry talked to mum im going to call my case co ordinator monday and make sure he knows how bad its gotten and i will do the same thursday with the pdoc. Im gonna start with small steps doing things again. I like your idea of having a list of things to fall back on. Mum wants more plants and asked me to help as to give me something to do from tomorrow.
I know it’s tough to admit you’re not doing well. I’m glad, though, that you know you AREN’T well. Sometimes, that’s what can make the biggest difference.
Don’t give up. PM me, if you think it will help.
I’m glad you had a heart to heart with your mom. That’s so important! I like that she found s good little job for you and that you want to do it. That’s healthy. You probably need an adjustment on your antidepressant med though. You may need more or something different.
Really feeling â– â– â– â– again today had good news was happy almost for 5 mins then it all went to â– â– â– â– been screaming i want to die into my pillow with music up so no one hears had my phone call to case coordinator he thinks the pdoc will do something to help me and told me to hang in their and call the mental health team line if it gets worse.
For the last 5 years ive had voices and delusions the whole time it was up and down in severity but they never went away no matter medication but this medication (Amisulpride) made the voices stop almost completely they told me they were going to try me on clozapine next i was not functioning well for the 5 years but i was talking to people in my head everyday all day i thought that was the reason. ive been on the same anti depressant since 2011 when i lost my job because it was too much effort to show up everyday and it helped alot back then there was a significant difference in mood and anxiety but then the voices started in 2014 and i can honestly say never in my life have i been this sad and numb. Sorry for the long post.
good luck on your journey to better mental health, there are solitions!