Wow, yeah. I’m pretty big. And several people have told me that I can be intimidating and scary. I don’t see it. Here’s my bottom line. I have paranoid schizophrenia. I am scared of everyone. Us schizophrenics are more likely to be VICTIMS of violence. I do not want to scare women or children, or the elderly. I just want the capacity to defend myself. That’s all. It’s a crazy world out there with aggressive, scary people. I mean there’s much more to life than physical threats. In fact I should be more scared of verbal threats!! I just want a little space, and to be left alone. I will repeat what Jayster said a few months ago.You don’t have to go very far to find assholes in this country. They abound. So I put up with them. But I deserve a fighting chance to defend myself. Anyway…thanks for letting me vent today. Going through a hard time.
Hey Nick, chin up. Come on. Don’t worry too much about what other people think. The only person you have to answer to is the person in the mirror. Be confident in yourself. Be a nice person, but don’t present as vulnerable. I get the sense you’re a little bit of a loner. Nothing wrong with that. I’m a loner. I see people on Facebook that have over 700 friends. I don’t even know 700 people, and yet they’re friends with half the country. Silly. I avoid people, and I’m guarded about who I talk to. Even a “How are you doing?” from the neighbors makes my spidey-sense tingle. Sorry you’re having a rough time. Think about all the things you have that you have EARNED. Your home, your sobriety, your sanity. You earned all that through hard work, The only person who can take that from you is you. I hear ya loud and clear about the world teeming with assholes. My advice to you is what I do myself. Mind your own business, keep a close circle of a few good friends/family members, and keep going to meetings with people who are also working toward self-improvement.
Thanks again Alien! You say some good stuff.
You’re welcome Nick. We’ve talked a bit in the past, and you were there for me when I was stumbling. You had good advice for me concerning addiction and recovery. I think you’re a good person. I want to be there for you too. I know you’re going through a bit of a rough spot and need to hear positive things, not some bumbling reply that has no bearing on helping you. This is a SUPPORT forum, and personally, I take that to heart. When bad things happen to good people, or when good people are struggling, that tugs at my heart strings. It’s in my nature to want to help. You and I are not best friends, but I still care about you, and want to see good things happen to you. We have to have each other’s back. We all here share a common enemy: mental illness. And while my schizophrenia may have been recently invalidated, I still have issues, and want to stick around to help all the good people on here who have become a type of virtual family for me.
OK, thanks Alien, it’s good to know there are people on here when I badly need encouragement.
Yes you do deserve to defend yourself, Nick, and I hope you never have to.
What you said about assholes made me laugh, it’s so true.
You’ve never been anything but sweet on this forum, hope you let your cute neighbor get close enough to se what a great guy you are.
you’re right. in fact i would say non-schizophrenics are more likely to commit wicked acts than the schizophrenic. you see this in people. i see this in people. a schizophrenic’s mind rejects “the word”, and keeps it external, you thereby recognize it as foreign. the non-schizophrenic has taken the word into his mind as the inner-dialogue, and believes it is his own. he then uses words to form his ideas and acts upon them. these will always be failed acts. they are product of the deceiver which leads all men astray.
There are tons of neurotic non SZ people out there lurking in society. These people are non SZ but have other issues .They love to bully and stir up trouble for others, especially those less capable to function as themselves. I personally have been taken advantage of many times, especially when psychotic. Many people love to ■■■■ with our minds further. Its the nature of this crumbling decaying society. Stay strong - this shall pass
Unless you want to get to know someone scary might be good. Keeps bullies from thinking you are an easy target. I use the extreme oddness I share with my friends (they aren’t odd, but I am odd enough to cover that). I think other people think I am weird even in every day conversation. I’m fine with that. It keep a lot of them at bay. If they are understanding people they will listen to my message not my presentation. If they are superficial skuzz balls they will only look at the fact that I use much different, non standard phrases to express myself and they keep their distance for me. I don’t have to feel like I am pushing anybody away.
Hope you feel better. and you surely are not a threat I’ve known you a long time now. desimb
I figure you’re ok if the mirror doesn’t scare you. There was a time when I couldn’t look in a mirror for long. Something about my eyes repelled it.
nick, you’re such a nice person was always my impression.
I hope you’re feeling better now having ‘vented’.
self defence is very important people are unpradictable thats what gets me i can have ■■■■■■■ nice perosn 10 assholes 20 nice people. i am way to quick with my temper sometime because iam a fr4ightened person dont poke the scared dog it will bite humans arent much different from dogs they dont all get along.
Hi Nick - Sorry you’re having a rough go of it right now. You’re a great guy and seem very resilient. I hope tomorrow is a better day for you.