My forever person just left me

Sorry to hear that @bittercat

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I don’t feel like my self esteem is damaged by this. I just feel heartbroken. I’m trying to imagine what these next three weeks of “trial separation” will be like without him and I can’t even do that.

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I hope that you’re right.

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I will continue going to work and taking my meds. I don’t know if I can do much more than that right now. But at least that will keep me as close to stable as possible at least.

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Yep. I thought we’d change together. Maybe I was wrong.

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Update: he took today off work and decided to come by for a while. He’s currently napping on the couch.

It’s good to know he’s okay enough to stop in. But I’m not sure how long he’ll stay. Maybe another hour.

That said, he’s been wishing me goodnight each night so far. Communication is little but it exists. I am grateful for that.

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Sounds like you have a lot of reason to be hopeful. Buddy seems to be going through things right now.

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He is. He has to make his way out of this on his own and I respect that, hard as it is. So I’ve been hands off. Only contacting him when he reaches out first. And it’s seeming to be good for him.

He is out grabbing lunch for us now.

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Sorry to hear about that. Hope you can find some peace during this time bittercat

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Update: SO is home today and staying the night. He seems to think he is going to lose his job. He may very well be right after all that has happened. If that happens I know his mental state will only get worse. Please send good vibes our way.

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well I’m glad your SO came back to you…there’s that…things go wrong when there is an interruption…it can be fixed…happy for you.

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He’s only here for the night. Then he’s leaving again:( It’s mighty hard for me to see him here and know that he’ll be away again soon.

tell him to stop visiting if he isn’t coming back…it’s not fair to you…he comes back because he is controlling how much you see him…not fair.

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I’m not going to tell him he can’t come home. That’d just make it worse for both of us. When he is here I can gauge his mental state and how suicidal he is. And that’s really important for me to know. When he is gone I can’t do that.

Besides this is his home too. No reason to kick him while he is down.

What I will do though, is continue to support him through this. He is clearly having a rough go at life. He needs as big a support system as he can get.

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well I just thought it was hurting you to see him…sorry…thanks for explaining…I feel the same about my wife…I know this is very important to you…I didn’t mean to sound flippant…I thought he had it together. and you were the mentally ill one.

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No worries. Hopefully I didn’t come off too aggressive.

We are both mentally ill. Him with MDD and me with SZ. I fortunately am nearly completely stable at this time so I can take the hurt of him coming and going. Sucks but it is what we have to do at this time.

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So sorry you are going through this. When my partner in the past got depressed he would try and sabotage our relationship by acting out of character and risking everything. it was extremely stressful and i blame alcohol for those rough times. I was also not the best mentally. Now that weve moved past those bad times, things are really looking up. I hope you get over this hump soon. Keep us updated.

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Thank you. It’s good to hear stories where people have overcome their circumstances for the better. I appreciate you sharing.

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Stay strong, you will get through this :innocent:

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I hope you two can work this out. You obviously love him

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