Me and my boyfriend are talking about me moving in. He is married and we are poly and his wife loves me and everyones on board with giving it a trial but it might not work out because of my dog. But if it does itll be so much better for me to not be alone all the time and ill be able to quit my job
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Give it a go. If you guys all love each other and can be supportive of everyone’s needs. Sounds like a good move.
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Sounds like things are going well for you… 
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Eh thats debatable lol this is like a desperate attempt to make things better
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Wow. Thats unique. Ive never heard of that situation. But hey, whatever works!
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I’ll be 100% with you.
I think this is a bad idea.
You haven’t been super stable lately and moving is a serious change.
And not just moving, moving into a relationship.
A complex one.
I wouldn’t jump at this opportunity before giving it some more thought.
Can you handle such a drastic change right now?
I’m not trying to be a Debbie Downer, but I just think a big shift in your life isn’t what you need right now.
I could be supper wrong.
Just offering my opinion.
Best of luck in whatever you do.
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No i hear you and i thought about that but this is something me and my boyfriend talked about before this all went down. Just feels more like an option because i am so unstable and need to quit my job and be around people, im tired of always being alone and having to gonto work
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@Moon , please don’t be offended but I wholeheartedly agree with everything @Charles_Foster said
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I agree though but were not jumping into it we agreed to take things reqlly slow and see what happens.
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Okay.
I think it’s great that you guys have talked about this.
What I think is a potential problem is that you’re, on top of everything else, about to become financially dependent.
I know you probably feel like this is your only move,
But is there literally anyone else you can move in with short term?
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No unfortunately. I mean i could move in with my parents but they would be so incredibly triggering for my trauma.
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But moving in soon isn’t slow. Once you move in that’s when all the stress begins. Plus, if you quit your job and they decide it’s not working what will you do?
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Oh were not moving in right away. Im going to be staying over there more often with my dog and seeing how things go
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Oh! Ok. That’s good news. Good luck!
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Would you have your own room in this new place?
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Yes my own room in a finished basement
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Well, I think that makes it a little better.
Having your own space is important.
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Wait-
Do they have children?
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Dude. As one poly veteran to another, this is SCREAMING danger. It’s that savior complex that seems super great at first, until you do something hing to make them unhappy, and you realize your entire livelihood depends on two people who have already committed to each other. This is going to end in you being forced into situations. Maybe not intentionally, maybe they genuinely want to help someone they care about. But if they control the living situation and finances, and you haven’t agreed up front to every expectation, it could easily end up with them feeling taken advantage of or you feeling like you aren’t allowed to voice your preferences.
It could also be intentional. Some unicorn hunters look exclusively for the “borderline bi genderfluid chicks” for the purpose of getting a live-in sex slave/maid. It is a serious issue.
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Basically what I am saying is, get a rental contract. Establish yourself as an equal member of the household up front. Be clear about what you can and cannot handle. Make sure their marriage is stable and cohesive. Have a backup plan for living arrangements.
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