ill keep it short, i’m 23 year old male. i took psychedelics and MDMA 2 years ago (LSD 5 times, mushrooms 5 times, MDMA 6 times) i bad tripped hard one time on LSD (was the last time i took drugs including weed) and thought i lost my mind, since that day i’ve had immense depersonalization, extreme self awareness and neuroticism and general low mood and have been fairly with drawn.
i’ve never actually heard voices or had hallucinations though i’m constantly in fight or flight listening for the voices. i trip myself out literally all the time. i’ve seen psychologists and they’ve told me i have no symptoms so i can’t be schizo. its hard to explain but i feel something is deeply off about my self and it feels as though i’m waiting for the day i crack.
if anyone can shed some light, it feels like i have some sort of OCD that is drawn to schizophrenia due to the trip aswell as the fact that my cousin has it diagnosed. all that said i don’t mean to be disrespectful by posting here if it turns out i don’t have it, i’m just really scared i’ve been living in perpetual fear for the last 2 years. any insight even personal experiences would be much appreciated.
The anxiety will go away when you get older. I got kind of used to anxiety. When your fears are not delusional. I grew into this world, but i have to take medication. Exercise helped me and mindfulness. Sometimes i isolate and go camping. Living in the here and now and don’t think about the future so much. We are in good hands.
Ap’s are antipsychotics. Honestly it sounds like something like anxiety but with a family history you just never know. We all start somewhere and coming into contact with street drugs often brings out those issues which are present from our genetics.
It’s really about function. If these issues are causing you enough distress that they are affecting how your living then it’s time to talk to a psychiatrist. A good psychiatrist has seen a lot of issues and will usually have an idea.
thank you for this reply… relieves some of my stress i haven’t freaked out like i did tonight in months, i feel like its external stress with school and my gf.
but forreal this reply was both informative and non stress inducing, im calling on monday to speak to either a psychologist or a psychiatrist. depending on wait times considering the lockdown where im living.
as of right now i feel fully functional except when i ruminate (which is normally before bed)
Stress makes symptoms worse. It’s still worthwhile talking to a shrink. They usually have better experience with mental disorders. You’ll find it’s more a spectrum thing anyways…there’s depression and anxiety and schizophrenia and bipolar and many symptoms often overlap.
These days it’s more about treatment anyways and usually that means medications if your multi episodic or your issues continue to affect your function. I’m glad your seeking help.
brotha you’re truly a great person and i deeply appreciate your empathy and informativeness. ima do my best to be proactive! hope everythings going well with you!
I’ve been in this forum for a few years and we get people experiencing what you’re experiencing from time to time.
I also have a colorful history with hallucinagins. Well, my use was kind of like yours. But it was enough to make me wonder if my psychosis wasn’t due to drugs. IDK…
Usuallly with schizophrenia you don’t think there’s anything wrong with you that’s why people go off meds and end up in jail/homeless. But you seem to be acutely aware of your schizophrenia.
lowkey makes a lot of sense the way you say acutely aware… becuase when i bad tripped ill tell you now its as if something switched in my mind. if thats the case im hoping its treatable, i’m an ambitious person and this has been holding me back.
just to clarify, does it sound like the beginning of schizophrenia, like over your years of learning about others exeperiences does it come on like this.
my mind seems overly logical and rational the only thing i cant shake is the feeling that somethings off.
It’s rare but not unheard of to self diagnose schizophrenia. Most of us go psychotic and end up in emergency or in other situations. Saying that. Family history can be indicating things but it’s not everything. People here have no family history and still get schizophrenia.
As previously stated. If your losing function it’s worthwhile seeking treatment. Medications can help anxiety and depression and make a big difference.
We aren’t in the position to diagnose and although we have many similarities in our journeys you need a doctor to have these conversations and a psychiatrist is that.
fully understanding of that, its just information gathering for me right now. thanks for your info and i realize its coming off as though im looking for a diagnosis.
Um… as to the beginnings of schizophrenia… well, most Internet forums are reluctant to give medical advice. But we can encourage you to seek answers from a qualified professional (a psychiatrist).
not a problem thought id ask, probably better not to know anyways. im gonna call on monday morning and sort everything out and see what i can do. thank you for the info
For me weed triggered these symptoms. I had these the year before my diagnosis. I think they are early signs of psychosis. My Drs said it was just stress back then. Hopefully you don’t develop full psychosis but watchout for psychosis symptoms and tell them to your Drs.