I am at my breaking point every bad emotion I can feel I am feeling hate anger hurt emotional pain frustration sadness depression paranoia anxiety shakiness which is in my chest and I am shaky inside I see the nurse Monday. Me personally I don’t think my meds are working like before I had them increased the last time I seen my Psychiatrist and its still not working. Maybe a med change is in order I don’t know I am no Dr. so it will be up to the nurse what to do. I hate going out in public too for fear of being laughed at pointed at stared at glared at made fun of talked about the list goes on I don’t think this is all in my mind I think its for real actually happening but no one else sees it that way but me. I don’t even want to leave my house anymore I am having evil thoughts of what to do to people that are staring at me haven’t acted on any of it just having some evil thoughts I know that there would be consequences to me acting out these thoughts I would go to jail for assault and I know its wrong to think these thoughts I am thinking about in my mind but cant keep from thinking it. People out there really hate my guts by the looks I get from some people. And its a mutual feeling I hate people too most people are evil and cruel and have no heart and a black soul at that for treating me this way. I feel no one cares I am alone and lost and hurt and feeling these feelings I feel no one will stand up for me against the ones who have hurt me and still are hurting me. I am surprised I made it this far without someone killing me or me doing myself in like I thought of many years ago. I attempted several attempts of suicide in my past I have cut my arms that just left scars didn’t help how I felt then at the time. And I have overdosed many years ago I was in my 20s when I did that. Would never ever attempt to kill myself again and those thoughts haven’t even came to my mind but thoughts of hurting others has especially the ones who have hurt me and still are hurting me. It would make me feel real good maybe for a second then it would make my situation even ten times worse. So while I am like this feeling these feelings I am feeling I wont be going around anyone unless I go to the store when I have too, be around people but I think I should just stay away from public places until I get my mind right.
Hi, I was just thinking of you today. It’s crazy that you would post. You were one of the first people that inspired me on this forum back in February. I don’t know what to say except I know the struggle, you are important and not alone. I’ll say a prayer for for you tonight. Sounds like you have a lot going on. The right medication can make you want to socialize again and not have all those thoughts. That’s what happened to me. Happy you posted!
Oh I’m so sorry @ImprisonedSpirit1.
Please hang in there and please don’t hesitate going to the ER if things get even worse for you.
Good thing you’re seeing your Nurse on Monday.
I am surprised anyone would be thinking of me wow don’t know what to say but thank you.I don’t feel any better yet maybe just a tad I am hopeful I will though once I get on the right dosage of medicine. It’s possible that these meds that used to work so well for me for so long no longer work like they should or I just might need it increased again. I will see what the nurse says tomorrow I am going to lay it all out exactly How I feel I have nothing to hide and no reason to lie besides lying wont help me telling the truth will help me get better.
I’m sorry you’re having such a hard time. Let us know how it goes Monday with your nurse.
Hang in there, and good luck with your nurse. A change in medication can make all the difference!
going to see the nurse today at the Behavioral center will update later how I am feeling
I just learned about this crisistext line that’s posted in the crisis pinned topic on this forum. Check out that topic section, Maybe that can help you talk to someone and get to a calmer place.
Hey there, you are not alone! We are thinking of you and i hope you start to feel better and your meeting with the nurse goes well.
@ImprisonedSpirit1 …sorry youre feeling bad at the mo…hopefully things will pick up, if they don’t get yourself checked in to a psych hospital…
I met with the nurse today and she emailed my Dr. while I was there I told her everything I was feeling just have to wait until the Dr. gets back with me on what the next step should be I should hear something by tomorrow if not my mom and I are going back to the Behavioral Health place again.
feeling a little better I even laughed today when my dad told a joke haven’t done that in awhile
There’s bad people who are bad out there, but there’s also some very genuine caring people who would make great friends for you. The world is a mixed bag. You can talk to any of us pretty much at any time you want as well. There’s usually meetups for mental illness in cities for us to be able to talk and meet others going through similar things, that might be worth checking out. Also, a weird thing that helped me is to get lots of sunshine and go to places to be surrounded by people. I hope you are feeling better.
feeling a little better today the nurse just called me and told me that my Dr. ordered a new med for me to try along with my Abilify and Lexapro called Buspar its for anxiety and all the symptoms that go along with it I pick it up today at the pharmacy, so I hope it helps me anyone else take it let me know how it works for you but everyone is different I just hope it helps me.
Do you have a burn out?
what do you mean by burnout?
Burnout is a psychological syndrome emerging as a prolonged response to chronic interpersonal stressors
yes I was stressed out but I am getting better now. The Depression is gone but my anxiety is still here.But things will get better for me I just know they will I ma hopeful that this new med will kick in and work for me if not plan b will be to find something that does work my Dr wants me to continue my meds like I had been doing I am now on Abilify7 and a half mg and Lexapro 20mg plus the Buspar.
I am a lot better since I last posted here the depressions went away after about a week after increasing my Abilify. I have been on Buspar for a week now I haven’t noticed any side effects yet hopeful I wont have any at all looks like its going to be that way. Anyone else take Buspar and does it help? And are there side effects I know everyone is different and reacts differently I just was wondering that’s all. I read that weight gain isn’t a side effect of Buspar God I hope that isn’t one for me I cant afford to gain anymore weight if I lose on Buspar that would be really nice but I read where weight loss or gain was not a side effect its weight neutral from what I read. I know I put on a lot of weight on psych meds over the years I didn’t used to be fat but it is what it is I don’t like it I’m hoping to change that by going to the gym three days a week Monday Wednesday and Friday are my gym days but I haven’t noticed any weight loss I guess it will take time but how much time I wonder? I want fast results and I know that’s not realistic to think that way but I want some kind of results I am doing my part going to gym and want it to pay off someday, Sooner than later. I know I am not the only one who wants quick weight loss results and I will not take diet pills I want to lose weight the natural way by eating less and exercising. Diet pills don’t mix well when you are on psych meds it could interact with them and give dangerous side effects I know from experience from trying Garcinia Cambodia diet pills and had severe chest pain that would not leave until I stopped taking them. I hate taking pills any kind of pills except my meds I take make me sick to my stomach and make me gag. I cant always have what I want I never wanted this illness but I have it so I deal with it that best way I know how, and if I have to take pills for the rest of my life so be it I don’t like this one bit but I cant change it must accept it and go on. Crying over what I have will not change the situation and staying locked up in my house and not wanting to leave will not change the situation either.