how horrid to be trying to give orders and be such a bossy boots.
i do not want to obey anyone ever.
i have agreed to getting bossed around a little if i give my consent and if i love the person and they love me and they do not talk down at me.
last fight i remember having with my mum was she said i have to much makeup on and told me to take it off.
i said we have different taste.
she was furious because i didnt “do as i was told”.
then when i got to my former stepmum the same day with the makeup on she complimented me for my makeup and how good it looked.
we all have different taste!
we had a biiiig fight a few years ago i was with a disability employment agency and i loved my coordinater/manager or what its called (the person working with me and helping me find work) i was excited about working with her but then my mum said i can nolonger go to that employment agency because they think im a schizophrenic.
i said but i am a schizophrenic.
she said no you are not you have aspergers.
she told me i had to change employment agencies to a agency that would label me as autisic instead of schizo.
i said NO.
oh golly did she chuck a ps####.
she was furious so i ended up doing “what i was told”: to keep the peace.
one of my great challenges in life has been as still is to stand up to my mum and others and not be so timid.
not be such a push over.
not “do as im told” when i disagree.
i loved serving my x such as making lunch and serving him but i did that out of free will.
different when someone demands it of you and talks down at you and supresses yu and doesnt value you.
i think it is relevant how someone asks for something too.
it is also relevant if they are unable to do it themself.
my mum lives in another country.
i could never live with my parents.
i would be homeless if those were the options.
they are not my boss.
my mum wanted me to be a free spirit yet she goes furious when i have different opinion than her and dont “do as im told” or stand up to her.
some parents even teach their children to say yes sir i will get you water.ha ha ha ha
thankfully my parents were not that way.
the first time i ever said sir was when i did hap kido martial arts.
my mum kindof taught me that sir is a dirty word.
kind of like saying you are my superior and i will obey you.
my sister thinks she is my superior and treats me bad so i avoid her.
some people are so agressive and try to be so dominant .
i can not watch some actors because it feels like they are attacking me through the screen.
trying to dominate me with their agressive energy.
just because they have agressive energy doesnt make them superior.
like da song goes fu ck you i wont do as you tell me …
actually my disobedience could get me homeless and in to trouble.
thankfully i have a woman who takes care of me and loves me unconditionally and helps me and never puts me down or supresses me but only empowers me and encourages me.she is my former stepmum.i pray to always have her.
her daughter is one who downs me though so i hope that will not become between us.