Looking back

I never even did drugs. I was in a really good art university and doing well, for a short period of time. And then I just broke and stopped doing anything at all. I broke all by myself, without anything to blame but my own mind.
I never went back to art college. I never finished at any school. I’ve just been working all these years and fighting to not break to the extent that I did back then.
I feel so sorry for myself. I think it’s unfair.
But no one can go back and change anything. And I am grateful for what I have now because it’s more than I actually expected.
I’m just thinking somewhat out loud.


That’s good to hear.

It’s a disease that just swallows up potential.


I wish I could just let go and appreciate what I have. But I can’t shake the feeling that so much more was stolen.
Thanks for being here, @everhopeful

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I lost all my potential. I’m mostly over it. Hopefully, in the next life I’ll have it better. I’m not optimistic though. This isn’t my first time with schizophrenia.

If I didnt do marijuana 7 years ago, I probably would have not gotten so sick so fast and maybe would have got the diagnosis later. Who knows?

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Like you said, no one can go back and change anything. All we can do is move forward with life and do the best we can. You seem to have a positive way of looking at it and that’s good.

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