I’m not suicidal or anything, or in any rush to get there.
But I can’t help but think this is a pretty unhealthy way to feel.
It reminds me of when I was a teenager, thinking how great adulthood would be and how much more happy I’d be. Well, we all know how that turned out… 
Any tips/suggestions/thoughts on how to deal with this?
I believe in an afterlife.
@everhopeful I can relate I’m in no rush but it has to be peaceful compared to the then and now.
I feel the same way @everhopeful. I am not suicidal but death couldn’t come sooner for me. I just can’t see my life changing and spending the next 30 years just existing is not living in my book.
I don’t know how to change this thinking pattern. Maybe we are just depressed?
Pretty normal belief some have. I believe similar sometimes.
Sorry @everhopeful
I understand life is hard - and I also feel I want to check out.
But I won’t as I have tried. But thoughts like these come when I’m struggling.
I would be lying if I told you to just snap out of it. It comes and goes.
But its important to just try and make it through the day. And the next. Some days will get better.
I don’t believe in the afterlife so this is it. If I’m done I get no second chance.
I don’t know if its the situation that you are becoming a caretaker day by day that is pushing you to think you want out. Or is this something you’ve always struggled with?
Yeah, you might be right. I think you’ve helped me. That might be the root of the problem.
I think that my dreams are a glimpse into the afterlife.
So ■■■■■■■ strange.
It is the autoimmune defense system and the compressional schizophrenic Centrum all wrapped up in one we depend on ourselves so much that we get to a point of doubting ourselves because our defense system are blinking out and failing this happens to all normal old age people in fact it’s not even your schizophrenia doing it it’s trying to cope with situational problems it has never encountered why you’re awake this usually happens while you’re asleep memory feeding is best served with longer periods of time of sleep that is restful sleep only this will lessen the effects that you’re getting today love you dude from your friends
Seems to me your asking what meaning your life has now? I’ve faught against nihilistic thoughts and feelings. My only way out is to express artistically how I’m feeling about life. I found it deeply tragic to consider the irish famines, the cambodian genocide, the KLA system, the Gulag for example and the negation against divinity. But thats because I appreciate beauty in the universe and my love for peoples lives. Even though people go through extremes that are devastating. It’s because you can appreciate the beauty in their lives too that makes it all the more painful to think someone can be destroyed physically or mentally. I also like that a psychologist I had introduced me to the notion of doubting. Being open to doubt about what sense of certainty one can have about anything. There’s always an alternative point of view. Which can be quite freeing.
You might as well make the best of this life, that you know you have for sure because they afterlife might be a lot worse.
I think hope is key in understanding how to cope with the monotony of lifes problems. If you don’t have hope, you lose the will to live…find hope even in the smallest things at first until you can build a bridge of hope to happiness…I did, and I used to be very down about my life and wanted to end it…big mistake…always hurts those you love and leaves a life unlived…sad…don’t do it man…I know you are just thinking about it but when you start deciding to really do it you won’t tell us and then I would be very upset…please work on it. don’t give up.
I told a therapist how much I felt like dying and going into a “better” afterlife, and he asked me how I know it’s better, maybe the next incarnation is in a world a lot worse than this one. I gave it some thought and I’m trying to be more grateful for the good things happening in this life.
For myself it’s completely passive. I’ve no wish to speed deaths hand, but a part of me is excited.
I miss home, I miss the eternal and infinite, I miss a place I came from, very long ago.
I believe death will allow these things to come again, I’m just going back. I’ve done it before and it’s just like waking up from a dream.
Perhaps delusion, but that doesn’t stop the longing that I know so well.
I’ve little to offer in way of release from the shadow that grips. But I can offer some solidarity, let’s see how far we can take this ride.
Be safe dude, you’re a good guy.
Good job reaching out.
@everhopeful Do you always think that? I also think that sometimes but I think its a delusion or residual positive symptoms, not so sure though.
I think I could be happy if there weren’t so many people trying to make me miserable. There could be ways to change your situation.
I often wonder about an afterlife. I have visited a bunch of near death sites where people talk about their experiences in the afterlife. I think that 90% of them are totally euphoric. Some of them had some bad experiences before they met God in heaven, but once they got past that their experience was totally euphoric. This one girl said that if you combined every good feeling you ever had into one feeling, her experience of the afterlife was better than that. I sometimes wonder where I will end up in the afterlife. Sometimes I think I am a good person that will go to heaven, but then I think, “Well, I did that wrong, and I did this bad thing. Maybe I haven’t lived such a great life.” Sometimes I wonder if I ever can die. I think a lot of people just lose consciousness when they are clinically dead. No consciousness at all. There were times when I couldn’t imagine my consciousness not existing, but one time I was put under anesthesia, and when I woke up later it was like I have just blinked. I had no awareness of passing the time that passed.
I think this thread is starting to turn into a little too much of a religious discussion. It was bound to happen considering the subject matter but I can’t allow it go on any further without ignoring the rules. I wish you the best @everhopeful and hope that you are able to enjoy the life you are living now as best you can. Gotta close this thread though.