After three months nicotine-free, I started smoking cigars a couple days ago. I’m yet to buy a pack of cigarettes.
After more than two years of sobriety, I drank myself to sleep last night. I’m a lightweight now, took just one Four Loko.
Stress is getting to me. I don’t know what’s going to happen if I continue to be unable to deal with it. The hospital is not yet necessary, and is not an option right now anyway. Doesn’t matter, there’s nothing they can or would do for me that would help. I see my psychiatrist Wednesday. I don’t expect her to be of any help.
Every day has to be new. Each day you can choose better than the day before. I don’t drink or smoke, but I use food the same way. Today was a bad day. Tomorrow can be better and so there’s always another chance.
Don’t give up and don’t dwell on what’s done. Focus on what you want next. ️
Wow, I had forgotten about this thread. I was in pretty bad shape when I made the original post; I ended up in a hospital (terribly suicidal) just a few days later.
I’m still off both wagons, but at least I’m not drinking every day. I drink just a few times per week, and I don’t really get drunk. When I start needing a drink every night is when I really start to worry about it. I know I should get back on the wagon, though. I know how heavy alcohol use, if it ends up getting to that point, affects my depressive/anxiety symptoms.
Glad to hear you’re in a better state of mind freakonaleash. I read on another thread that you’re a fan of NOFX. Me too man. They’re awesome. One of my favorite albums of theirs is “I Heard they suck live.”
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