I think it’s time to take a break. For how long… well, I don’t know. My life isn’t where it needs to be right now, and I so mad, and I don’t even know who i’m mad at… but I feel like i’m mad at myself. Lately I have been treating my family bad and its all been due to paranoia. But today I spent time with my younger siblings, and I played with them and was actually having fun. As far a religion goes, I was a raised christian. But lately I’ve ignored and even denied God’s existence. Then there’s my mom, before I came back I hated my mom, like actually had hate thoughts towards her. It was mostly paranoia but I realized that no matter what my mom has always been there for me. She is a beautiful, smart, loving woman, but I treated her like she was one of my old girlfriends who I didn’t even care about. I’ve been depressed, and even empty, but I also realize I’ve done nothing but seen life for it’s bad. Yeah I don’t have a lot of things right now, but like you guys always say… I got to appreciate the things I do have. I have family, I have art, and although I’ve been ungrateful… I still have my life. I’m battling some demons right now(as my mom always says), but if I keep repeating my same mistakes, I will never get better. I’m going to stop resisting the help people have offered me, start treating my mom like she should be treated, focus on my future(cause I still think I have a purpose… or else I wouldn’t still be alive). This forum has effected me for good and bad. I love having people to talk to, because up till now, I have isolated myself from everyone. But the bad side is it makes me continue to rely on my sickness… if that makes sense. Well I really don’t know how long it might be, but whenever I do decide to come back, I plan on this emptiness to have a little more to it, and most of all be better then what I’ve been. This is not a goodbye… but a “see you whenever” Maybe my opening up can help others see if they need a change, or if they need to be showing “Momma” a little more love. Well I will see you’ll whenever, and remember “Art Is Life”.
Good luck…
hope everything works out for you…best wishes
Take care, ArtIsLife. Stay well with your family and remember to take meds.
Yes take care @ArtIsLife - You have a lot to offer, including your beautiful Artwork - I do hope you find some tranquility in your life
Take care of yourself. You are welcome back when you feel like it.
Finally getting that insight and accepting help is what got me out of my darkness.
It sounds like your on your way to a better mind set. I’m glad you see that you’re Mom is there for you.
Keep that loving family close…
I hope to see your stuff hanging in a gallery someday soon.
Wishing you the best and I hope to see you again…
@ArtIsLife i don’t know you well but from what you have written,you want to change…i wrote a post of me deciding to change my life and be a person who is happy,positive and most importantly grateful for what i have in life.i am having a not so good day today,but at least i have done the things i should have done and i have little regrets for today,thanks for your post,it lighten me up