It still bothers me even though I know it’s their issue not mine

There’s this girl in Iop without serious mental health issues. She’s a drug addict. She’s 40 years old and she’s the most rude person ever. ISSUES!!! But she’s only mean to me. And no one else. Maybe cuz I’m a nice guy. I know this girl is very very sick. Never met a recently active cocaine Benzo speed addict who wasn’t.

But she even admitted yesterday “I know I’m really mean!!!” And I’m like “nooooo, really??” I know it’s her issue but still bothers me. Some people are just spiritually like bankrupt. Is the word. It’s sad to me I’ve gotten sober and realized how sick everyone is. Maybe I was somewhat self medicating the fact many people are very miserable. And I hate dealing with negativity. By getting high I was all but blocking it out. Now I have to deal with shitty people. There are good people but it’s like 50/50 and there’s no grey area. Either you’re good or you’re bad. People have lots of envy too. And the incapability to be nice and empathize. I think she sees In me what she doesn’t see in herself. I’m not gonna snoop to her level and be mean back. But keep it to yourself if you’re so goddam miserable!! Or at least don’t bring your problems on other people.

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I find myself taking my anger out on my beautiful and nice mom now. It’s a viscous cycle I guess. Now I feel really guilty.

So I made a conscious effort to acknowledge being mean to my mom and now I’m being really nice :+1:. Yay for mindfulness.

There is a verse of a Romanian rapper who said
“Half of us don’t get along sober
So I smoke a joint and drink a glass
So I can understand something
So somebody will understand me”
It sounds so much better in my language

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It’s cool beat and flow!! Too bad I understand zero Romanian!!!

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He’s one of the best

Pinch of salt, please.

First, no human is all good or all bad. Goodness and badness are fictions, and relative at that.

Secondly, what do you think people are envious of?

Early in recovery, my friend, we’re all vulnerable, so that means you, me, and this woman. The rational way is to just accept these emotions and move on. No one is in the right or wrong on having issues. We all have them, and we all get thru them. Just be philosophical about the whole thing. Deep breaths, and remember to focus on just your recovery, not other people’s.

That’s my advice. It’s not perfect :slight_smile:

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Jealous that I’m a nice guy from a good family, my parents support me, I don’t have to work , I get disability. Trust me this girl is jealous easily.

Yes no one is perfect. Which is true. And some people are bad to some while good to others. But I do find it black and white. I think I meant to say “they either love me or they hate me”. Just worded it differently. But that’s what I meant. But it tends to be bitter envious non spiritual people who don’t like me. Sorry for this misclarification but I stand by every word I say. Either you get it or you don’t!!! “Everyone is fighting a hard battle, so BE NICE”. Is 50/50. All or nothing. :wink:

Okay. I just woke up. I’ll think about what you say. I may still think my way, tho!

Disagreement is ok :ok_hand:. I love being told I’m wrong which is why the 4th and 5th step are my favorites in aa/na. Really damage to your conscious and make you question your faults. It’s important to be both open minded AND critical. So you can take the good AND leave the bad. Life is a growing process and we learn from each other. This is a unique disposition to have. Critically open minded. Some people are too critical, some too impressionable. Just like anything in the world it’s important to have a balance. :yin_yang:

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I was just sort of commenting on relativity of perception. Every individual is different, hence right and wrong will vary from person to person. In other words, there is no absolute… and I think that’s the point we disagree on right now. I am OK with that, too. I like your yang and yin icon, btw.

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I don’t think we’re in disagreement. Maybe you need some coffee :coffee::rofl:.

“EVERYONE is fighting a hard battle, so be nice!!”

The key word is everyone , not nice. And that’s what some people don’t understand. When you understand it’s everyone. You find more serenity within and don’t take out your anger on people. I’m not perfect :ok_hand:. I took my anger out on my mom. But at least I made an effort and changed my ways. Mindfulness.

I still have a long way to go to find Enlightenment. But I make the effort. Hmmm maybe you’re right. And it’s not so black and white And Some people just can’t see it. Maybe im wrong I am sometimes angry toward my mom. Maybe I’m wrong.

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And that’s just it; viz, maybe it doesn’t matter who has the right answer. Maybe there is none?

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I think the only right answer is “moving forward and willing to change”. We are forever changing our philosophies. Evolving as a species. I know Ive come a long way in the past 5 years. Just five years ago I didn’t have the ability to empathize. The right answer is willing to change. Can’t convince me that willingness to change isn’t perfect :ok_hand:. It’s been fun. I will post the passage that shows how I became able to empathize. Hold on ;).

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But back to the nature hike. Not to kill the vibe of the magical night. The moon had appeared from behind the clouds and the sky had suddenly cleared up. An owl was hooting and the stars were more evident than any other night John had ever seen. Jeff Garrison must have had 3 or 4 drinks on this Friday evening because he was a tad talkative. Or he just wanted to get some points across to John James.
“You hear that owl?”
“Yes, sir!”
“Do you hear that owl?” he repeated. “I don’t think you understand.”
John thought for a second and said, “What do you mean?”
“Do you hear the pain in its hoot? Its want? Its desire? How much it wants that rodent. How much he wants to survive. He wants it too.”
John was confused at first but then said that he never really thought about it that way.
“Now think about humans too. They’re just like that owl. Every single one of them. Black, white, rich, poor, et cetera, et cetera. Every single human wants that rodent in the field.”
“So you’re saying we want to eat rodents?”
“No! You’re missing the point. We all want it equally. We all are equally conscious, aware. We all struggle and feel the pain when we don’t have the necessities of survival.”
Chills ran down John’s spine. He was never a racist or prejudiced or an egoist, and he always thought things should be equal. That everyone had the right to live and be happy. But all of a sudden he began to put himself in the shoes of others. Of everybody else. Then he stared at the moon, and the stars.

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Nice. I esp like the equality part, being equally aware. I smiled at “John James” Audubon :smile:

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Wow you just blew my mind. My full name is Jon James + my last name. The character based upon myself. Didn’t realize it was a famous ornithologist!!! Coincidences coincidences.

This really happened to me at 23. I related an owls pain to human suffering and became very empathetic. Like on the fast track to understanding empathy. I’ve told a million people that an owl changed my life. It really did!!

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Plus I go to the audobon society daily ;). Would’ve been more remarkable if I was there. But I wasn’t when I heard “ the owl”

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We learn from each other every day when we’re open. It helps to get a good sleep, too.

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