Intrusive thoughts. 😢

it can’t be me, because i wouldn’t think things like that, why do i think things like that? they’re in my brain, they control my thoughts and are making me go crazy because i know more than i should …

they put sick things in my head … i hate it and i went those thoughts out… why do they happen… i hate myself for thinking them and they keep happening so i try to stop it and think something else and they just get worse. it’s the worst when i’m just about to go to sleep. i hate it. i hate it so much. i can’t imagine what people think of me.

there was a whole thread about intrusive thoughts, recently.

Not sure what your thoughts are, but I know I get obsessed with stuff I usually have no interest in, then feel bad or guilty after. No idea where it comes from

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Everyone has sick things in their head. Everyone. In the case of me and thee, we’re on a bumpier road where cargo that normally stays hidden gets knocked loose out to where it can be seen. Doesn’t mean that you’re a bad person, just that you’re traveling a rutted road that has shifted your load at a bad place in the journey. Props to you for keeping all of your wheels on the pavement in spite of it all.

:heart:

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I got those before. My advice is to not let it get to you. Mine was that I keep getting a stream of racist curse words pop in my head whenever I looked at anyone. Then the voices would call me racist. I don’t believe that I am but the point is to not worry about it. Treat it as something natural that happens that you have no control over.

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i can’t go into detail. it’s disgusting and horrible, but it’s sexual and involves children. i’m not sexually attracted to children and i never have or will touch a child inappropriately but the thoughts go through my head anyway and there’s nothing i can do to stop it. this is just an example of what it was tonight, but i hate it and i can’t handle ■■■■ like that. who wants to think that.

it just makes me disgusted with myself

“Know more than I should” I can relate

And they do the children ■■■■ to me, too. And I hate it, too.

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Sorry you have to go through this, and we all know you are a good person.

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Oh, Ra, think of intrusive thoughts like your brain is a spoiled toddler and will do anything, no matter how awful, to get your attention. If these thoughts didn’t upset and disgust you, you wouldn’t have them - your brain would have moved on to something else to shock you.

Not only doesn’t it mean that this is something you enjoy, it actually means the very opposite of that. I can’t go into detail about the kinds of thoughts I have, either, but trust me: they’re repugnant. That’s the whole point of them.

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It’s important to know that if the thoughts are undesired and you object to them, then you’re not a bad person. You would be a bad person if you had a bad thought and agreed with it. Obviously you are troubled by them, so you are not a bad person. Simple logic.

I get them all the time. Sometimes violent ones that scare me, thoughts and images of me doing actions you would only find in a horror film. But I hate them, they scare me, and I object to them. When they pop up, I find it useful to try to distract myself and change my environment (go to another room) and stay away from whatever my mind has targeted with the undesired thought.

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Ditto on the thoughts. I KNOW I have no intention of hurting myself or anyone else or doing anything disgusting and, yet, these thoughts jump in my head. They are me being hurt, other people being hurt, sexually oriented etc. Sometimes it is obsessive thought repeat of a traumatic event from my past that just won’t f**king go away. I don’t have the almighty answer. I can only say that I try to refocus and distract myself. I try to think loving thoughts about my wonderful children. I picture them laughing and smiling. That is my go-to when it’s particularly disturbing. Sorry you’re dealing with this. I echo everyone else when I say I don’t doubt you are a good person.

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