I dont really think im Schizophrenic.
I feel like ive made this shiit all up.
Im actually normal.
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Well, you are very high functioning by most standards and are on a great medication. It’s normal to feel like that early on even for us lower functioning folks. It’s a trauma or something hard to process internally and swallow.
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You and me both brother, the voices tell me I’m not sick.
On my good days I don’t feel sick. Thoughts that it is all real and not just inside my head.
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I think that pretty often. Then I get symptoms and remind myself pretty quickly. This weekend I was at a party and thought there was gonna be a mass shooting. Then there was a mass shooting at another party and thought that I did it with my mind. Took a little extra seroquel now I’m all good!
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I experience the same self-doubts. I’m not happy at the moment, but I feel normal! A little tired perhaps, lethargic and anxious in the evenings, but otherwise OK. But then again I’ve been in hospital for 5 months now.
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When I feel okay and stable I wonder if my symptoms are fake. I feel like a fake. Then if I miss meds or get under a lot of stress they come roaring back and I know it’s all real.
Pretty common. Don’t beat yourself up. Just continue to take good care of yourself. It’s better to feel fake than to experience psychosis.
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Haha yes i have that too at times. On a good day or even a good hour (like now :)) I secretly think “omg im healed, everything is forever going to be stable and good and peaceful and fine” and i start planning for that. I apply for a job, book a holiday, go on a date, clean my house. Even if i was feeling terrible 2 hours earlier.
I hope you enjoy how well you are doing now…just dont rush into anything.
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I feel the exact same way. I struggle every day with feeling like I’m fake and not real. I think it’s part of sz/sza.
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I sometimes feel like I can just ditch my medications and function but I think it’s part of the disorder to feel this way.
In reality I would destabilize very quickly without meds.
It’s just that once in a while I have this urge to come off of my meds.
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Me too. A lot. Even when I just got better and took increased dose for a few days. It’s crazy. But I stay on meds for my husband’s sake. I don’t want to hurt him or be a burden to him.
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@anon4362788, @anon39015889, @Ooorgle, @Ninjastar, @NotSeksoEmpirico, @insidemind, @Hadeda, When I was psychotic, I used to doubt myself all the time. Thinking I was making it all up, and that the pdocs didn’t believe me, and that none of it was real, and that I was really normal. Now that the psychosis is gone, I realize how real the psychosis really was.
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It’s crazy how powerful the mind can be. It can wreck havoc. It sucks.
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Your clozapine is working so well you feel normal, I imagine. Please stay on it though!
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It’s such a relief to see so many others with this same belief. I have struggled with it ever since my first episode. Sure it was hysteria. I still think I’m making it up. But the negative symptoms are obviously real. Plus reading here makes me realize lots of my symptoms are pretty typical.
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Adding to the Chorus - that i believe im faking it. But i remind myself of the intrusive voices and delusions i had when i was in relapse.
I doesnt help matters, that i i’ve had people tell me i was faking it -
just to secure disabilty benefits. Mind you this was coming from a woman that tried claiming DLA for vertigo!
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