I mean that truly believe I don’t have sz but yet constantly put pressure on me to take meds.
Who are they?
I’m guessing psychiatrists, therapists and family. The usual. Or maybe this board
I had a convo with my therapist today about med compliance and she said shes rarely met a patient who became med compliant the first time taking meds. She told me stories of people with psychosis in ACU being told “WHATEVER YOU DO, DON’T GO OFF YOUR MEDS. PROMISE ME THAT. PROMISE ME THAT” and 8 months later they’re back in ACU or arrested because they went off their meds. It’s sad but eventually we learn.
I remember the 4th time I was in the psych ward I thought I was the chosen one and this lady was schizo-affective with 8 years out of the psych ward, here I am thinking I’m some big shot chosen one, I wanted my voice to be heard so I ask her in a casual confident manner “What kept you out of the psych ward for 8 years?” good question right? Well she said “Just taking my meds.” I’m like “Yeah right lady, I’m the fricking chosen one, I don’t need meds ”…well that’s what I thought to myself when she said that.
Then after the 6th time hospitalized I learned to take my meds and haven’t been hospitalized in over 20 months now cause ive been on meds all this time.
When I was 21 22 etc I dumped meds in toilet
now I am 35 and taking them regularly
What happened to you happened to me
I was ignorant and now I can’t go back
and correct my life.
Yeah I flushed clozapine down the toilet. I had a giant stash of saphris in my apartment my parents later found when I was in the psych ward and they were cleaning my apartment which was a mess. I went off my zyprexa because “It wasn’t helping me”…it was helping me, just not curing me, it was stableizing me. Then I had a psychotic episode and got arrested and wound up in two psych wards for the next 2 months.
Yeah… I was really med compliant thinking I was also super paranoid about taking them. I think on a subconscient level I knew I needed them. Now that Im well enough I dont see myself getting off of them. I really value my sanity since I got it. Im a better person on them. I used to be all over the place, with irritability and mood swings. Im way better now.
I thought the meds were all placebos lol
You are very unique and lucky (well I wouldn’t call it luck ) for being med compliant the first time. I was so far gone messed up in the head from my first, and second psychotic break. I thought “If I take more LSD it will make me become the chosen one better”…“And if I take my meds I can’t get high on LSD”…so I would go off my meds and take LSD or mushrooms and screw myself up even further. Then I realized I had to take meds, it took me a little longer to realize I can’t do the drugs than I have to take meds…I get better every day on meds. After 20 months on meds my brain is still healing…I feel my brain will still be healing 5 years from now…
Well the recovery never really ends. We just get better at it. I think sobering up its such an important step. Im really proud of you for making that decision.
My therapist is in alcoholic recovery and she’s 9 years sober and says “I can’t guarantee I’m never gonna drink again. But I’m not gonna drink today”…I may take a drink again :…but I sure as hell am not gonna do psychedelic drugs ever again! marijuana, mushrooms, lsd, mescaline, dmt, ayahuasca, i’ve done all that crap and it wasn’t a waste of time, but my days are numbered.
If I drank again it wouldn’t be the WORST thing in the world, but I don’t want to drink alcoholically again ever. I still haven’t come to the realization that im powerless over alcohol…, they say in AA “1 drink is too many, 1000 is never enough”…I still can’t decide if that’s true for me. But today I won’t drink, and I’ll keep telling myself that
I’ve been so talkative lately, I had a 70 minute long therapy session with my therapist, and there wasn’t enough time. It’s only suppose to be 45 minutes but she kept me for 70 because I reckon she was enjoying my chatty nature so much, and I was saying interesting things to her.
Hmm im hungry
I talked about sz.com
I mentioned I talked to people from all over the world…From portugal to croatia to australia to other states
I told her I was the only one from New England which I think is true.
What did she say about the forum?
Can you say who is putting pressure on you? And what do you take and what dose?
I can imagine like turningthepage said pdoc and family…and board But still, tell us more please.
she thinks its great not only for me but for every member here. I told her that I share my delusions and that at least 1 person here has had every single delusion that ive ever had and she smiled and said “People share their delusions? That’s great they could get feedback on people who have believed the same things it makes you know you’re not alone and it helps you work on those delusions.” I reckon in real life people keep their delusions to theirselves a lot, even if both are SZ. But here it’s such an open and accepting forum where you can choose to be anonymous, that it allows us to open up a little bit more. She really liked the idea of this forum. She said she wouldn’t go on though
Sounds like a good therapist. Respecting your space and all. We hijacked this thread.
My parents mostly.
They worry about you. Youre probably better on them. It seems to be so with basicaly everybody. I wouldnt think much into it. My mom also thinks im better on meds, even though she had a hard time believing I have sz
7.5mg abi@ify is what I take
Pretty low. Are you symptoms free? Im on a low dose too.
Pretty much symptom free. None that I know of anyway but I’m sure the pdoc can weed out some
What dose you on?