I want to know why my sister has been ignoring me for the past 8 years

She doesn’t care about me anymore?
She hates people with schizophrenia?
She is busy with her kids? Work?

I’m enjoying my life now and not lonely or anything, not that I want to hang out with her like old days, she’s married and have kids so I guess we no longer have much in common. I don’t think about her much anymore but I still sometimes do when something suddenly reminds me of her, and wonder what she’s doing. She ignored all my emails but sends a new year card to my mother every year with my name on it which annoys me. I’m not living with my mother. She has never sent one to my apartment. She doesn’t know my home address and never asked my mother where I live. No idea what her intention is.

According to my mother, she seems normal except that she clams up when my mom brings me up. Does she have complains about me?

I still keep many old letters from her. She used to love me. She was very supportive when I got first ill. But later she got married and had kids and that’s when she began ignoring me. If she wants to get me out of her life, that’s her choice but why she writes my name on new year cards to my mom? Is that a mere appearance? It really confuses me.

Should I throw the letters away? Do you guys can forget siblings who you spent your first decade or so of your life?

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I have similar situation with my sister
When I lived with her in same town when we were young we got on ok even went on holiday together
Now she married with kids we live far away she comes to visit sometimes but I feel that she’s only visiting my parents and I’m just there
Maybe distance has parted us mind you we never always got on very well

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@bananatto I think I can understand your sister. When a young woman becomes a mother to the little kids, she is ususlly so preoccupied with her kids that she hardly pays attention to other people. I was that way when my son was little. So you should not be annoied by your sister’s negligence. She was just too concentrated on her kids and her work.

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I found that my family doesn’t want much to do with me either. since the diagnosis. and it could be because it hurts them to love me, and see me like this. when i’m in the midst of psychosis, no one knows what to do, and i can see them beating themselves up for not being able to help.

Often the diagnosis itself can scare people away.

My friend doesn’t like me around her kids, even though i’ve never hurt anyone.

It sucks. have you tried talking to her about it?

If so, no problem. It started so abruptly, so I felt strange and thought something might have happened to her. I’ve never raised kids and no idea how hard it is.

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I believe your sister still holds nice feeling towards you but she is just too busy now and she thinks you are safe and stable so you need not much care from her.

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This,

I didn’t contact her for about 7 years and emailed her lately after I’ve gotten really well, but she didn’t reply. I understand if I’m still deeply in psychosis, but I’m pretty normal except I’m not working. I have no positives anymore and my mom tells her I’m normal.

Why not visit her and her kids, maybe they would like to see their uncle banana lol take care

Maybe. But if she sends me even one word to express that feeling, I would be able to stop thinking about her. I don’t like complete silence.

I don’t know her address

It is also possible that she doesn’t think it’s a good thing to let her kids be close to any Sz person due to social discrimination. So you may ask your mother and let your mother figure out if your sister wanted to protect her kids by not allowing them to contact you.

Is her husband a snob?

Maybe she’s afraid. Afraid of seeing you not doing well. Afraid you might hurt yourself or someone else. Maybe she feels guilty for not being around. Or is just busy with the kids.

I’m very sorry to hear that though, i wish things were easier.

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That’s pretty awful to teach kids it’s acceptable to discriminate against other people. That’s not education.

Her husband works in a famous car company. I’ve only met him once and haven’t talked much but he was nice for the first few years of their marriage, like he bought me a bday present.

But maybe she’s too scared. I sent her lots of crazy emails to her when she was pregnant. I couldn’t control myself at the time. That might be traumatic to her. Later I apologized to her but she ignored that too. I understand. But I don’t like that she tries to show that she cares on new year cards when she really doesn’t.

So once you were labeled crazy you’ll be seen as crazy for the rest of your life? That discrimination make us crazy. We aren’t criminals.

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I know… but it’s true people get scared when they hear the diagnosis. Form opinions and ideas. It’s a stereotype. most of us aren’t violent , scary, or dangerous at all.

I wish it wasn’t like that. It’d be nice if those closer to us tried to understand that psychosis comes and goes, and most of the time, we can be normal as anyone.

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It reminds my relationship with my sister.

She refuses to show me where she lives. She is my facebook friend…thats all.

I think you should reach out to you sis…but not like every day. She probably wants the “pretend relationship”. This means she wants to look like a good sis…You could use that to get a card or a birthday congadulation on facebook. When she has a birthday send her sms. Then you get her “thank you”.

Now I’m beginning to understand that this isn’t personal; it’s schizophrenia
If she’s decided to discriminate against people with schizophrenia, at least she should stop pretending that she cares.

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If she discriminate against people with schizophrenia, she’s definitely a stupid parent who believes she protects her children while giving them pain by teaching them discrimination, how to pretend to be a good person, etc.

But I remember as a kid me and my sister and my mother talking with a book of people from different countries and my mom asked us which country do you dislike? And my mom and sis say they dislike jewish people because they look pale. I said nothing.

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Dear bananatto,

I think you’re a victim of your schizophrenia.

I’ve been driven crazy by the sort of thing you describe.

Well, I’m lonely and it seems some folks who could be giving me support aren’t stepping up to the plate.

Some have argued people are hard for schizophrenics because we can’t figure people out.

@77nick77

Jayster

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