I should be grateful

Even though I tell others not to worry about what you don’t have but to be grateful for what you do have, it still takes an effort for me. I saw my new therapist for the first time two days ago. I don’t think she likes me but she was impressed at what I do. She actually laughed in delight when I told her I almost have my college degree.

I have to accept that in some ways I will not catch-up with most so-called : “normies”. It’d a bitter pill to swallow but I have to accept it. I can still blend in and do a lot of things so I will be grateful. I accepted years ago that I will never marry or have kids but that doesn’t bother me. I can mostly move around in society, I work with normal people and I live with normal people. I need to put out more effort and get back in the saddle and live my life again.

I haven’t given up by a long shot.

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That’s quite a huge achievement.

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@77nick77…you are NOT behind! I know so many people that are in college that are our age and older!
My mother was in school off and on until she was in her 60`s. It took my sister 10 years to get her degree because she had to work also.
You are about where you should be for YOU! All you have to accept is “for now”. There are no limitations as far as I can tell.
Good job and well done :crystal_ball: **

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Thanks, bridgecomet.

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Attitude of gratitude. It’s important. :wink:

Pixel.

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I understand. Sometimes I have the same issue with accepting my condition and realizing I may never have a stable mood in my life but I do my best :o) I believe you can totally marry and have kids of your own. I don’t know how severe is your condition but disability doesn’t mean you can not have a normal life, fall in love and have a family of your own. I’m always unhappy and worried but it never stops me from going after what I want most. Happy to hear you’re getting your college degree. Best of luck! <3

Sounds good to be hear. Yes, since becoming SZ I have learned to be more thankful/grateful for certain situations & pleasures in life. I’ve accepted my place in society and am just holding out, really, until I depart (death - afterlife).

I, too, know I will not be marrying or procreating either. That’s going to lead to tons of freedom if there is a world beyond this one. I can hardly wait to be completely free of some of these nonsensical desires.

That was a nice answer waterway, and I’m glad you’re still trying to get what you want. As for being stable for me, it comes and goes. I got out of the hospital in 1982 after an 8 month stay and moved into a nice Residential Treatment Home. I became stable and I figured I would never be hospitalized again. Unfortunately, I relapsed in 1988 and it was terrible and I was hospitalized again several times. I didn’t pull out of it until more than a year later. I became stable once again but I still had bad symptoms.

Much to my surprise, in 2003 or 2004 when I was in my forties, certain symptoms of mine went away! Not all of my symptoms, just some of them, but due to these symptoms going away, my life got a little more manageable and a little more comfortable. So if you heard rumors that people with schizophrenia improve as they get to be forty or fifty, it is certainly true in my case and I know that other older people on here have experienced the same thing.

I just wanted to add that I’m 54 years old and I first got sick in 1980 when I was 19. For the first two years my symptoms were VERY severe and I could barely function. It could take me an hour and a half to get dressed in the morning. I could not work, I could not go to school or make a friend. I had no money. That was in the early eighties.

Today, I have been at my janitor job for four years, I need 4 more classes for my degree and I live independently. I hope you have the same luck as me. Everybodies case of schizophrenia is different, it’s just the luck of the draw but you can take certain steps to improve your condition, which you probably know. Anyway, I didn’t mean to blitz you with a huge post like this but I hope you get something out of it.
Peace out.
Nick

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The actual fact, however, is that none of us who believe in the “perfection” of the so-called normies will ever understand that they’re never going to catch up, either.

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Try not to judge yourself by the standard non-sz people would use. You’ve shown great courage in overcoming problems that would defeat many people. Give yourself credit for taking responsibility for your illness and doing your best with the hand you were dealt.

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Thanks. You’re really sweet. I can function and I have some other type of psychosis. I mainly suffer from lack of motivation and emptiness. I’m sorry to hear you went through those stages. What do you want to do when you get your college degree? I’m so impressed that you reached this far :blush:

Thanks Crimby, that’s very encouraging. Have a nice day.

Hmmm. I’m sweet? I can live with that.
It’s possible to get motivated I hear often. I hope it becomes possible for you.
My major was in Humanities but the cliché is that having a degree in Humanities will help in very few concrete ways. It’s hard to get a humanities-based job. It will look good on my resume though and on a job application that I got ANY kind of degree. Anyway, you seem nice, have a nice evening.

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