i’ve been through phases of androgynous expression
i hate the way i dislike things in myself that aren’t the norm
this seems to be talked about now but i’ve not spoken about it in any honesty until yesterday.
i’m 47
i haven’t even spoken with my partner about it
i’ve been completely masc in dress and manner in phases
as a young teenager as experimental phase and in my 20’s as a long time where people kept on asking if i was gay. or if i did want to be attractive to men
i hadn’t realised i was dressing masc just wanted to look good
when psychotic i felt the root of life was androgynous and tried to express non binary in walk and manner… it felt really right and true to myself
the thing i hate most of all is the way i haven’t expressed androgynous more fully
i’m now stuck with not THAT much sexual attractiveness in life ahead of me and feel that i’d been thinner i’d have been So Much more daring
i just hate the fat butch look i’ve had at times
but i hate that i don’t look better when i am masc
i felt fake dressed feminine a lot of the time
hated dresses and hardly wore makeup for over a decade
other times my fem attractiveness was all i cared about and loved it
only if i look good and i don’t know how to do it right
at my age i’m not going to get the look i want
i hate more the post menopausal attempts to be feminine
maybe i’m not as comfortable as i want to be
i want to be it more than it feels good but it’s been a long time
all my life i hated myself until about a year ago
so maybe give it a go
i spoke to a friend who said you don’t have to define as masc or fem you can be both
that was freeing
i suit short mid length to shortish androgynous hairstyles
i don’t want to look butch
I think you should just be you. And dress and style yourself as a tomboy would because I am sensing you like and feel more comfortable with being more masculine aesthetically.
Why not be you. Not label yourself to yourself. But identify as non-binary and let people use mixed pronouns.
I grew up as a boy dressed as a boy, but liked to play dress up opposite sex. Through my teens broke gender norms through up to about 19. I was not and never have been trans. I ended up feeling more comfortable as CIS gender gay male. I do want to be male and addressed as he/him.
Forget gender. Dress and style yourself without labeling if it makes you look like traditional labels, from CIS gender to butch female, girlie, forget all that.
You are beautiful and can really do anything you want. So what if you look like a gay woman even though you are not. You can pull off like beautiful masculine. What ever makes you comfortable. I think you can pull anything off. Even at 47 and til the end of time.
Does this woman’s presentation make you think masc feminine. I think this is an example of it doesn’t matter. She is androgynous. But obviously a woman.
i always wanted to bind and cross dress and hate that i didn’t enough but i clearly did on and off
maybe this is the definition of not getting gender norms
No but I’m sure there are members on this forum who can have experiences that can help.
But its really cool you are tackling it face on because you want to be true to yourself and feel good.
i always wanted to try binding and cross dressing even on my wedding day
maybe i love both
i have never talked about it with my husband even though he’s autistic and feminine in feelings and has always had an obsession with annie lennox
I think you are okay with feminity. But also curious about androgynous masculine leaning looks. I think you should try things you’ve always wanted to but have been afraid to. It’s just exploring yourself. You are finally admitting this to yourself on a public forum. You can eventually share this side of you with your husband.
