I’m done with mania

Hi everyone, it’s been a while since I’ve posted an actual update. Over the past 3ish months I’ve been experiencing hypomania and for a while I felt really great. I was getting a lot of praise at work and lots of compliments on how good of a job I had been doing. But more recently things have taken a turn. I have been extremely irritable and angry. I always want to pick fights. I’ve been recklessly spending and doing impulsive things. I broke up with my ex. At first I was feeling super self confident but now I’m just full of anger and self hatred. I haven’t been sleeping much, haven’t been eating much because I haven’t felt hungry. My pdoc says that I’m slipping into full mania and I’m scared. All of my suicide attempts have happened during manic episodes and I feel the urges to end it all coming back. I guess what I’ve learned is I need to take hypomania more seriously than I do because it almost always leads to this for me.

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Are you taking meds?

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Have you tried Depakote?
It usually squashes mania in a flash

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I am on Abilify 30mg currently. I’ve been on many many APs and none of them have been able to help with the mania, most didn’t even help with the psychosis

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I haven’t tried depakote, I’m afraid to because I refuse to go on any meds that will cause a lot of weight gain

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