I keep getting the feeling my friends hate me, or that I did something wrong. I kept messaging one of them, but she never said anything back. And the other one said I need to calm down and she will talk to me later. I just wanted a response to make sure they were okay. I didn’t mean to annoy them. I just go worried something bad happened and I just wanted to make sure they were okay. I am I wrong for doing so. I do get clingy and nervous easily. I scared of being abandon. Do to my family abandoning me and I almost became homeless.
I just kept getting something was bad going down in their lives and I just wanted to be there for them. I felt like a type of sense. I used to think I had some sort of physic powers when i was younger. It really messed me up for 7 years. I got used by alot of people. Alot of guys tried to date me and would lie to me just to try to get in a relationship with me. It really hurt. I have issues now when someone says there’s something special about me now, or that I have a gift. I get scared and uncomfortable when people talk about god and the bible. Do my hallucinations when I thought I seen demons and Angel’s. I alot of trama form past events. I still feel things. I just try to think of it as scientific and logical way to help me get through a delusional when I can.
I do feel wrong for messaging them to much. I didn’t mean to come off as rude. I am just blunt not passive aggressive. If I was angry I show it. I like to keep my anger under wraps though.
I getting a new diagnosis and tests my next appointment. I wrote everything down for my therapist that i forget to talk to her about, or I am scared to talk to her about. So that way she has better information and everything she needs to do her testing accurately. I also will talk to her about my current issues as well.
Thank you for reading and if you can give me advice please do so.