I went to see my excellent pdoc today, I told her that my depression still existed and my depressive episodes are getting deeper and lasting longer. The problem is that because of the type of bipolar disorder I have - fast mood shifts/ultradian cycling and mixed episodes - I cannot take your traditional SSRI or SNRI antidepressants - Heck I can barely tolerate Lamictal, an antidepressant type mood stabilizer. She seems to be telling me that antidepressants will make my anxiety, mood - psychosis worse - She is basically telling me to continue with the dose of Lamictal and if my depression becomes more chronic and deeper (severe depression) - she will give me emergency meds for it.
So in the meantime I am going to have to live with my depressive episodes - lack of motivation, sadness, etc…
Her thinking is that if it is just on and off it is tolerable - deal with it. I do know that antidepressant type meds destabilize me further, she is right. I am a depressed person who cannot take antidepressants or antidepressant type meds.
She did however mention Latuda as an alternative. This would mean that I would have to go off the Risperdal - a good medication for me. But if my depression goes deeper and becomes more chronic I will probably ask for Latuda - I will have no real choice - In the meantime I will be living a blue life
We are here with you. I don’t take antidepressant, too, but I have been told by psychiatric professor (the head of my psychiatrist) that Fluanxol depot has effect on me to ease depression.
Sorry your choices seem so limited right now. But I’m impressed with your working relationship with your pdoc.
Before I started taking an anti-depressant (Wellbutrin) there was one idea that seemed to help me sometimes. I would allow myself to be good and depressed but tell myself it often doesn’t last more than 3 hours. I guess it gave me a feeling of light at the end of the tunnel.
Keep posting if possible!
I am also glad you and your doc are working as team on this one. I admire you patience to stick with this and keep an open mind.
I hope something gives you a break through so you can end the circle.
I’m rooting for you.
I am so sorry to hear that you have very limited choice for the treatment of your depression. Risperidone is good at suppressing voices and delusions , but risperidone had brought severe depression to me around four years ago. So I don’t think Risperidone is good for you. Hopefully latuda will perform better on your body. Never give up hope!
I’m kinda in the same boat. Having to live with the depression. I don’t seem to be as treatment resistant as you are as I am not as bad as I was and am able to tolerate antidepressants. They just don’t seem to be helping. I don’t have any words of advice for you, I wish I did. This type of depression is so oppressive and energy sapping. I joined a DBT group and that helped me gain some coping skills. I know that my emotions come in waves and that I just need to wait them out. Like when I am so low, like SI/SU it only lasts for a while, if I can just make it through that hour or two then I even out and go back to blah. Most of the time I cope by filling in the time. When I’m not busy doing something the blackness creeps in and the depression gets really bad. So I do stuff. Craft, read, watch tv. I’ve learned not to just zone out, that makes everything worse. I need to keep my mind engaged. No alcohol, or in moderation when I do indulge on special occasions because its a depressant. I cut out the people that were in my life that brought me down. Except my mom, she sucks the life out of me but hey she’s my mom I can’t cut her out. A schedule helps to. Getting up at the same time everyday and going to bed at the same time everyday helps. If you ever want to talk PM me.
Thumbs up on Latuda from both my wife and I. It can cause TD, but so can a lot of other nastier stuff.
I also an depressed and very very anxious and would probably benefit from an SSRI if I could tolerate it without it making me acutely psychotic… I take ativan for the anxiety, but I hate taking ativan.
I am on clozaril for psychosis, also on haldol. At my last hospitalization last winter i was put on latuda 80mg. They thought it would help my psychosis. Also, my mood. It did help, and I eventually after 6 weeks got out of the hospital.
When my pdoc tried to increase the latuda as an outpatient up to 100mg, I got manic and psychotic. insomnia, voices, and agitated. could only toleratea 80mg.
but, I do take the latuda still in addition to clozaril and haldol. not sure how much it helps my mood and anxiety.
brooke
I am a little leery trying Latuda - if it acts like an antidepressant, I will probably get manic on it or my psychosis will be aggravated, or my anxiety will worsen - antidepressant type meds have this effect on me. I am barely tolerating a low dose of 50mg of Lamictal, any higher I will get hypomanic and my anxiety will worsen, any lower and my depression gets worse
Wave-I remember when you were talking about Latuda some time back, and didnt feel good about switching around. Maybe its time and you can start low.
I hope you can find an alternative.
Hang tough–things are going to turn around for you.OO