I don’t want to continue this miserable existence. I hate my body, I hate my thoughts, I hate my illnesses. I keep being triggered and having flashbacks to traumatic events. The littlest things trigger me. I am out of control with my eating and I just want to be slim. I feel depressed, nothing makes me happy. It feels like I have a pointless existence. I don’t know if I am suicidal, but I don’t feel far from it. I feel numb. I just want everything to get better. I WANT to get better. I WANT hope. Maybe I’ll get some relief from this darkness
I’m not really in a position to help you because I feel the same, too. All I tell myself is just try to enjoy what time I have alive, and deal with the problems as best I can.
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I just go to bed each night hoping tomorrow will be better. Then I wake up the next day disappointed I’m still here
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Me too.
Im a short man at 5’6 and to make things worse, im overweight.
You should be proud of yourself with how much you exercise. I wish I was as dedicated as you are.
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Yes @TheCanuk I exercise. But my eating is out of control so I am still overweight. I’d probably be massive if I didn’t exercise as much as I do
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My wake up is similar, I love sleeping its the best part of life right now, and I really regret not sleeping more hours but its not possible.
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Everyday I wake up and regret getting out of bed. I am TERRIFIED that school is almost over. HOW am I supposed to fill my three days off with productive things? The only positive is now I will have more time to go running
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Time kill is brutal, but you have to find some things to do. I divide my time between different devices. I have things I do on each one. Gets me through the day… kinda
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I guess my dog is motivation to keep me going. If I wasn’t here she wouldn’t have anyone to care for her. I want to stay alive for my dog
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Thats positive. No question you should try to stay alive, that’s what the whole game is supposed to be. This day and age its a little easy, even if homeless you can easily stay fed etc. The challenge today is coping with psychological misery not environmental factors
You recognize the issue, and you’ve admitted to yourself and others you have a problem.
That’s a huge step in the process of recovery.
Now you need to commit to working with the dietitian and following their advice thd best you can,
Admit when you fail, how you failed, and why - what was the thinking process that led to binging.
You can do this. It won’t be easy, but it is doable
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Yeah the eating thing is a really big part of what’s going on right now. But there’s also other things I am dealing with on top of that as well. I am glad I have a therapist. And hopefully the dietician will help with my eating too
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I’m so relieved to hear you have a therapist. Please keep going and be painfully honest and be willing to analyze your thoughts and subsequent actions/inactions.
That will really help you in the long run
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