I just feel uninterested in everything. I feel totally tired and flat.
After years of suppressing my emotions, it finally comes to this.
I was also criticized when I cried or showed emotions, such as being yelled at. I wish I was taught how to show my emotions, but I was always told to suppress them.
I just feel tired. Life is absolutely exhausting. Has no point, and everything seems so bland.
My mom keeps saying that she doesn’t know how I feel because I never say anything. The thing is, I don’t FEEL anything. I don’t have interest in anything, and nothing makes me happy. I can’t generate an interested response to whatever someone’s saying. Then my mom gets upset because I don’t show interest in what she is saying.
The thing is, I feel pain all the time but I never feel happy.
I’m so tired. So tired of living. So tired of my existence. I just want to breathe.
Sounds like depression. I sometimes get like this also. I just force myself to be productive and do fun stuff and it helps make me feel better. Also 5 - 6 espresso shots or a few cups of drip coffee help immensely. Working out/eating healthy can help also.
I feel the same. I try to force myself in to doing things but mostly I just lie on the couch or bed. I wish I was passionate about something but I think something is fundamentally wrong with my brain. I don’t feel depressed though. I feel like my brain doesn’t engage in anything.
I just have apathy from severe depression. I have psychotic depression, which means my depression is chronically severe enough for me to have psychosis. And most of it is being fueled by trauma.
Planning to but I am currently signed up for physical therapy that’s 60 dollars per session. Unfortunately that’s really expensive for me so we’re planning to wait it out until I can get back on the government sponsored physical therapy.
Therapy sessions are also 100 dollars per session. Soooo expensive
I’m so sorry you went through so much trauma, have c-ptsd and feel like that. I’ve been in that state, it is hard to cope with. To hang on. Still: do hang on. There is so much that can get lighter and better, still. People do find healing from such states of mind, they really do. You can as well.
Trauma has a lasting impact on our lives. I’ve experienced trauma since childhood through adulthood and I still struggle with coping. There is hope though so I’m here to tell you that it can get better, not easier, but better so best of everything to you.
I have no way of getting out of these traumas. And even more harder when you feel like you did something wrong to make other people suffer. I treat myself like a criminal at most.
I hear you. It must be hard. I’m looking for words of help, but it is difficult in a few sentences over the internet.
I know this place of deep shame and self-hatred. I was there for a long time. I too inflicted trauma, out of my own trauma, and felt horrible about that. And still at times, like this morning, every mistake I made falls on me. This is what happens, when people have C-PTSD. It is not some sort of character fault of yours. I don’t think you are any worse than me, or than others.
And you do deserve something better. I know sometimes life can turn in ways, that bring in light again. Slowly. I really wish that for you as well. Is there anything you can do, just for today, a small thing that would be caring for yourself? It won’t magically solve your problem today. But just as a tiny step?
I appreciate that so much. My entire life was so painful.